MEN AND WOMEN ARE DIFFERENT, LET'S FACE IT, BUT THEY ARE CREATED FOR THE SAME PURPOSE

I have just engaged a Facebook friend (well, that now remains to be seen) on the overly contemptuous subject of women being seen over the centuries as the weaker sex and having to walk through storms to become strong. I have never liked or believed that statement because in truth we are not comparing apples with apples.

To begin with the reference to women being the “weaker sex” comes from a Biblical interpretation. It is a variation on the words of 1 Peter 3:7: “Husbands, likewise, dwell with them [your wives] with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel…”

Note the term, vessel, not sex or gender. Some scholars say that when Peter uses the term vessel (in Greek, skeuei) he meant just that, a vessel or a jar or container of some sort.

And if that’s case, what Peter’s saying isn’t that men should take care of their weaker wives, but that they should treat them as one would a piece of pottery that warrants special care, like a family heirloom.

It’s also worth noting that the whole passage that precedes it is about how newly converted Christians of the day should treat their unbelieving spouses. So, it seems clear that Peter was saying that men should treat their still-pagan wives with special care. Rather than lording their new-found religion over them, they ought to woo their wives into the faith by affording them special dignity.

This makes sense because he has just told Christian wives to win over their unbelieving husbands in the same way. (3:1-6).

Now to the subject of strength

It might be true that men have a higher percentage of lean muscle mass than women, but that definitely doesn’t make women the weaker sex. Not when you consider the extraordinary fortitude exhibited by women around the world.

Researchers have found that in times of famine, epidemic and hardship over the past 250 years, women have consistently outlived men. Anthropologist Adrienne Zihlman says that’s got a lot to do with women’s need to adapt to adverse circumstances.

“Women have to reproduce. That means being pregnant for nine months. They’ve got to lactate. They’ve got to carry these kids. There’s something about being a human female that was shaped by evolution. There is something about the female form, the female psyche, just the whole package, that was honed over thousands and thousands, even millions, of years to survive.”

COME ON guys and gals, this is not a competition. Men protest oppression and injustice too and they also walk through storms on this journey called "life". But there’s often something particular about female resistance. Where male protesters can be provoked into violence, women seem more able to harness their strength to remain genuinely resistant in the face of cruelty or hatred. 

I am purposely staying away from the women's movement and equal rights with this post because there is no argument in that from me and besides I do not want to complicate my thesis.

Suffice to say, I grew up respecting women (including girls my age) in the 1940s and '50s, due primarily to the way I was raised. As I told my Facebook friend, I didn't even realize that we had a problem until the 1960s when I began to read and hear about it -- and by that time I was raising two daughters of my own. Granted, I may have been more conscious of the issue sooner in life if I had been born female.

The women's movement of the 1960s and 1970s drew inspiration from the civil rights movement. It was made up mainly of members of the middle class, and thus partook of the spirit of rebellion that affected large segments of middle-class youth in the 1960s. Another factor linked to the emergence of the movement was the sexual revolution of the 1960s, which in turn was sparked by the development and marketing of the birth-control pill. Reform legislation also prompted change.

Contemporary society is just now beginning to delve into the true distinctions between men and women. Besides the obvious physiological differences, there are also differences in the way men and women think, speak, and behave.

We're created for the same purpose

In order to understand the essential nature of man and woman, we must do away with human subjectivity and look through God’s eyes. Every human being, man and woman, was created for the same purpose — to fuse body and soul in order to make themselves and their world a better and holier place. In their service of God, there is absolutely no difference between a man and a woman; the only difference is in the way that service manifests itself.

Man and woman represent two forms of divine energy; they are the male and female elements of a single soul.

God is neither masculine nor feminine, but has two forms of emanation: the masculine form, which is more aggressive, and the feminine form, which is more subtle. For a human being to lead a total life, he or she must have both forms of energy: the power of strength and the power of subtlety; the power of giving and the power of receiving. Ideally, these energies are merged seamlessly.

As I say, men are physically stronger. By nature, they are usually more aggressive and externally oriented. In contrast, a woman usually embodies the ideal of inner dignity. Some people confuse such subtlety with weakness; in truth, it is stronger than the most aggressive physical force imaginable. True human dignity does not shout; it is a strong, steady voice that speaks from within. The nature of a woman, while subtle, is not weak. And the nature of a man, while aggressive, is not brutish. For man and woman to be complete, they must each possess both energies.

The answer is not for men and women to try to be alike. All men and women must be themselves, realizing that God has given each of us unique abilities with which to pursue our goals, and that our primary responsibility is to take full advantage of those abilities and to be recognized for such by society in general.

Though feminism rightfully calls for the end of male domination and abuse, and for equal rights for women, it is vital to get to the root of the distortion — that our focus in life, as man or woman, must not be simply to satisfy our own ego or needs, but to serve God. True women’s liberation does not mean merely seeking equality within a masculine world, but liberating the divine feminine aspects of a woman’s personality and using them for the benefit of humankind.

Women do themselves a disservice when they harbor the sigma of the weaker sex. It is no longer applicable...In truth, it never was, in spite of what males of antiquity may have been led to believe and what women may have accepted as their lot in life.

After so many years of male dominance, we are standing at the threshold of a true feminine era. It is time now for woman to rise to her true prominence, when the subtle power of the feminine energy is truly allowed to nourish the overt power of the masculine energy. Both sexes have already proven that they can use strength born within them to "walk through storms" and to slay demons around us. Let us then now learn to nurture the Godliness within, even going so far as to graciously step aside when the writing is on the wall.

NOTE FROM DICK AT 2:26 A.M.: I really should not have tackled this post by adding my two cents, but perhaps it was the Devil that made me do it -- at midnight no less! At any rate this has been the way I see it, from a simplistic male perspective that will surely be subject to criticism. I've got my nerve, I know! But this is what I do -- more often than not when I should be in bed sleeping.

MY RESPONSE TO A NURSE'S TOUCH

Okay, I admit it! While consciously restraining from it for socially-imposed reasons, I am extremely sensitive to physical touching. For me it is a human interaction in lieu of, and often more effective than, the spoken word. 

A pat on the back, a caress of the arm—these are everyday, incidental gestures that we usually take for granted, thanks to our amazingly dexterous hands. I cannot help but feel physical touches are far more profound than we usually realize: They are our primary language of compassion, and a primary means for spreading expressions of compassion.

In recent years, a wave of studies has documented some incredible emotional and physical health benefits that come from touch. This research is suggesting that touch is truly fundamental to human communication, bonding, and health. In fact I've learned that people can not only identify love, gratitude, and compassion from touches but can differentiate between those kinds of touch, something people apparently haven’t done as well in studies of facial and vocal communication.

 I want to illustrate the foregoing by relating a personal story.

Yesterday I attended a pre-arranged hospital consultation with my surgeon regarding unanticipated upcoming ostomy (colon cancer) correctional surgery. Maria, an ostomy specialist nurse, conducted the preliminary examination and listened knowingly as I related some of the stresses and setbacks in lifestyle that I was experiencing. She also sat in as the surgeon shared rather complex surgical options with me.

During the 15-minute consultation that followed Maria, a completely compassionate yet what-you-see is what-you-get type of  person, stood a the foot of the examination table. While not aware of it in the beginning, I became sensitive to her hand placed softly on my leg just below the knee. Her hand remained there, unmoving for the duration of the meeting with the doctor, so it was not a temporary and fleeting action.

By no means a distraction, as time progressed I increasingly felt the impactful significance of the feeling emanating from her hand on my leg -- calming, assuring, caring, empathetic. The more I thought about it on the drive home from the hospital, the more significance I gave the simple gesture I had just experienced.

Was Maria unconsciously demonstrating a caring attitude, or was it a conscious nursely technique applied to a patient who might be suppressing anxiety at the moment? I intend to ask her about it next time I see her...just out of interest...not that it will change my reaction to it.

Either way, I felt it...AND APPRECIATED IT!

It is so often the small things in life that mean the most.

SINGING CAN BE A BATTLE WITHOUT SWORDS

When King Jehoshaphat, the ruler of Judah, stood facing the prospect of advanced forces of Ammonites, Moabites and Edomites there was no doubt that his country was under existential threat. The path forward seemed completely unclear – until Jahaziel the Levite and King Jehoshaphat realized that they still had one unconventional tactic at their disposal…

In the face of fierce enemy armies, King Jehoshaphat chose a seemingly suicidal response: sending Levite singers into battle ahead of his warriors. The amazing thing is that this tactic worked above and beyond any normal military response: “As they began to sing and praise, the LORD set an ambush against the Ammonites, Moab, and Mount Seir, who had come against Judah, so that they were routed” (2 Chronicles 20:22). 

Here's a bit about what transpired that remarkable day: When the people started out to the battle, the king again encouraged them to believe in God. Then he appointed certain ones as singers to go out in front of the soldiers. This is the song they should sing, “Praise the LORD; for his mercy endureth for ever.”

The people of Judah did not have to do any fighting; the singers sang and praised the Lord. Soon it was learned that the enemy had a battle among themselves, and had killed one another. The Lord had caused the enemy army to be destroyed before God’s people reached them.

The king and his army went down to the battlefield and found so many jewels and so much money that it took three days to gather it all up and carry it home. They rejoiced and gave thanks for the un-fought victory over enemies that worshiped idols.

The Amazing Double Meaning: “Out of the mouths of babes and infants you have founded a bulwark because of your foes, to silence the enemy and the avenger” (Psalm 8:2). This verse, quoted later by Jesus, contains a fascinating play on words. The word עֹז (ʽOz) – translated as “bulwark” here – has the primary meaning of strength and valor, with a secondary meaning of praise. This one Hebrew word captures the essence of the entire story of the army that won by singing.

Sometimes understanding one word is like reading an entire story. Discovering the meanings of Hebrew words in their context can unearth surprising and inspiring insights to stories related in the Christian Bible.

Now to the reason for this post: Famed hymnwriter Robert Lowry wrote this well-known refrain: “No storm can shake my inmost calm while to that Rock I’m clinging. Since Christ is Lord of heaven and earth, how can I keep from singing?” In more recent times, Salvationist pop star Joy Webb sang, “I want to sing it, I want to shout it, I want to tell you all about it.” Singing is one of the ways that we engage with the gospel message and it allows us to reaffirm and share our faith and belief in God with one another. Unfortunately, in these days of the COVID-19 pandemic, singing has been deemed a high-risk activity. In fact, congregational singing may be absent from our corporate worship for the immediate future.

While we hope that this is a short hiatus, many meaningful alternatives can awaken our spirits the way raising our voices in song does. It is not going to be the same, we know this. There is no replacement for singing, but there are certainly ways we can both augment our personal devotional time while allowing a different expression of worship to emerge.

We can’t underestimate the importance of singing in our own homes. This is the one place where you can really let loose and have a sing-along within your family bubble. I do it all the time and happily, there is no one to suggest that I not give up my day job. LOL

There has been much written about the decline of singing in churches. Perhaps this moment of pause is our time to reflect, reassess and renew our commitment to singing our faith. Singing hasn’t stopped. Music hasn’t disappeared. Take this time to make your singing personal, which in turn will make it more meaningful. When we all do sing in harmony once again, the sound of our worship will undoubtedly be more powerful, fresh and new.

OUR POLITICAL LEADERS: GOOD, BAD AND THE UGLY

With increasing frequency I deplore all the negative talk about the leaders of our countries today...Rarely hearing anything positive, if ever. Some would argue that criticism holds the government accountable but quite frankly, at the current level, I find it exhausting -- unhealthy even.

Surely to heaven our governments do something right occasionally but you wouldn't know it because it is never acknowledged publicly. Recognition, ideally, comes only at the polls during elections.

History, interesting enough, is replete with examples of good and bad leaders. Queen Elizabeth 1 was an exemplary monarch who said: "It is not given to man to tax and be loved." One would presume what she meant was that a ruler cannot tax excessively and be respected by his or her subjects. She practiced what she preached, taxed modestly and was adored by her nation.

Peter the Great was a Russian Czar who followed a long line of incompetent leaders. He abolished the plow tax and the household tax which together had been crippling the economy and replaced them with a simple and single poll tax on all males. Peasants who worked hard and purchased new equipment and lands could keep the extra revenues generated. Notwithstanding the fact that he was a notorious boor, he reversed the declining Russian economy (albeit temporarily) by remaking the tax system, stimulating economic growth and decentralizing the state.

William Tell is famed in Switzerland not for shooting an apple off his son's head, but for inciting a successful tax revolt against Austria's King Rudolph. In 1315 (if you can remember that far back) Rudolph's troops descended on the Swiss infantry outnumbering them almost 10-1 and were still defeated...Apparently the Swiss were stronger mad than the Austrian were greedy.

There is no denying that modern Canadiana has had more than its share of the bad and the ugly. In the 1970s the Liberal government gave us such an enormous per capita bureaucracy it was laughable on the world stage, and Pierre Trudeau himself will forever be remembered as the godfather of deficit financing.

Despite PC Brian Mulroney's '84 campaign promise to give civil servants "pink slips and running shoes," like a good Liberal he hired a whack more and gave us the GST. With more truth than fiction, Britain's Margaret Thatcher noted in her memoirs that Mulroney was a Progressive Conservative who placed far too much emphasis on the adjective.

Of course we had Joe Clark and Kim Campbell sandwiching Mulroney in the Prime Minister's office for no more than a cup of coffee but almost humanely they did not stay long enough (less than a year each) to do much good or bad. Suffice to say, I met and liked both of them, stop gaps that they were.

As to the last three decades of Canadian politics...I'm not even going to go there.

Like I said, I'm kind of turned off by all of it.

GOOD NEWS: GREY-BRUCE COVID-19 FATALITY FREE

As COVID-19 cases continue to rise in parts of the country, one region in Ontario has managed to keep its coronavirus death rate at zero. And that region, I am proud, happy and relieved to report, is Grey-Bruce where my home in Southampton is located smack-dad in the middle, along the Lake Huron shoreline.

Grey-Bruce in fact, is one of only a handful of health units in the province that has not reported any fatalities due to the virus. Dr. Ian Arra, the Medical Officer of Health for Grey-Bruce, told CTV's Your Morning that the diligent work of health-care professionals and "robust public health communication" has been the cornerstone of the region's response to COVID-19.

"What I see here is a commitment to health from local political leaders, commitment to health and compliance from the public that has been informed, engaged and concerned," Arra said. communication is key during emergency, too much is not enough," he added.

Arra explained that Grey-Bruce has a team working to provide valuable health information to residents in a timely manner. In addition, he says local media "has been optimal" in providing transparent information to the public while asking the hard questions to get that information. That collective communication has helped produce results in limiting the spread of COVID-19 in the area.

Arra has previously told Grey-Bruce residents to assume each one of them has the virus, so they might behave in the most careful manner possible. "In Grey-Bruce, we happen to have communities that are engaged, concerned, and continue to have optimal compliance, whether it's the individual organizations, or the group, the families, all around," he said.

While communication and compliance has not been limited to the Grey-Bruce area, it has been most effective in smaller regions. The specialty of public health throughout the province has been utilizing communication during the emergency, and establishing and operating within municipal and local partnership is part of the specialty of public health.

Grey-Bruce recently partnered with Bruce Power, a leading supplier of medical isotopes, that has donated 1.7 million pieces of personal protective equipment to the region including $200,000 worth of masks and sanitizers for schools. Arra said it is these kinds of commitments to public health from local leaders that has in part helped limit the spread of the virus.

With 164 total cases, 156 of which have recovered, and zero deaths, Grey-Bruce has largely kept COVID-19 at bay.

Arra said this is also due to health officials' rigorous contact tracing. He says the region is tracing 100 per cent of contacts after a positive case. He explained that Ontario's passive surveillance protocols notify the public health officer of each area when a positive case is reported in their region.

"Then you would go and trace everybody that that person was in contact with in the past few days before being diagnosed, and through that process we evaluate the reliability of the information for the individual who's providing the information, and we cross examine it with information from many people who are contacted," Arra said.

Through this process, Arra said health officials ensure that if there was transmission from the original case, those who may be possibly infected are notified and tested if they have symptoms. "That will ensure the majority of people who have cases [or] who have symptoms are captured. In general, it's a very robust protocol," he explained.

While he acknowledged that Grey-Bruce’s emergency response isn’t perfect, Arra believes it is working so far. "Have we missed one or two? I'm sure there are cases out there that have not been tested. However, it is the shape of the curve and the ability to trace and continue to trace [that] is essential for mitigation," he said.

Certainly the wearing of face masks and social distancing was initially a hard-sell in the Saugeen Shores area (Port Elgin and Southampton), especially during the peak tourist season (June to September) but I would guesstimate that a good 90 per cent of people seen on downtown street today are complying. Food establishments still provide take out service only although several churches have resumed Sunday worship services, adhering strictly to provincial health safety guidelines.

Thanks to everyone in Grey-Bruce for doing it right!...And setting an example for the rest of the country.

Grey-Bruce Population served: 162,977
Median age is 47
20.7% are 65 or older
15.1% are 0 to 14 years old
6.4% are 15 to 19 years old
Population growth since 2011: 2.04%

First Nation:
The Chippewas of Nawash Unceded First Nation Neyaashiinigmiing Indian Reserve No. 27
The Chippewas of Saugeen First Nation No. 29
Chief’s Point Indian Reserve No. 28

MEET MY BORN AGAIN KENYAN FRIEND PASTOR FRANK

Frank Njuguna at his handmade pulpit

"Praise be the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. Consider everything loss and garbage for the sake of Christ. Further, my brothers and sisters, rejoice in the Lord! It is no trouble for me to write the same things to you again, and it is a safeguard for you. Watch out for those dogs, those evildoers, those mutilators of the flesh. For it is we who are the circumcision, we who serve God by his Spirit, who boast in Christ Jesus, and who put no confidence in the flesh -- though I myself have reasons for such confidence. If someone else thinks they have reasons to put confidence in the flesh, I have more: circumcised on the eighth day, of the people of Israel, of the tribe of Benjamin, a Hebrew of Hebrews; in regard to the law, a Pharisee; as for zeal, persecuting the church; as for righteousness based on the law, faultless. But whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ." ~~ Francis Njuguna

I want to introduce friends and followers to my Facebook co-conspirator Francis "Frank" Njuguna of Nairobi, Kenya. He is a remarkable young man who has overcome countless obstacles to become a born-again Christian -- a man of God in the truest sense.

We exchange greetings and conversations via late-at-night text messages and have quickly overcome the language barrier, thanks mainly to Francis' adaptability in speaking Spanish, English, Kikuyu and Swahili, coupled with a sincere desire to share his testimony.

THE SMILE SAYS IT ALL!

Francis is currently pastor of a small, very new Community Presbyterian Church in the rural village of Athi, a two-km walk from his home. The church, founded less than a year ago, is quartered in a rather dilapidated, rented two-room house where services are held Tuesday and Thursday evenings and on Sunday mornings (8:30-9:30 prayers, 9:30-10:20 children-youth bible study and 10:20-12:30 worship service). A first anniversary will be celebrated December 15 by the church's 11 adults and nine children.

Music, surprisingly, is a big part of the fledgling church's services, Francis himself singing and playing guitar and piano. Younger brother John is also a frequent contributor and an eloquent speaker often featured in the recent innovation of on line worship services in both Swahili and English languages.

But this is by no means the beginning or the end of Frank's story.

His impoverished mother died when he was only seven years of age, leaving him in the care of an older sister who in short order had no choice other than turning him over to one of the many quarry operations in Kenya. It was there that the young lad spent his formative years as a child laborer.

Here, in his slightly edited words, Francis describes his childhood: 
"I attended primary school, which after school, it was a must I attend either quarry or go to forest to search firewood. It was also mandatory for me and other siblings to go to church which was 3km away from home every Sunday. But before attending the church it was a must I go to the river and fetch water. In Class 6, I got tired with situation and a friend introduced me to smoking cannabis sativa.

"The result was that I even stopped attending to some duties and Church. Well I finished my primary level Class 8, under pressure but taking marijuana was by now a lifestyle. I did not go to high school in the opportune time, I now devoted myself to working full time in quarry, at the age of 14. That was back in 2001. From 1999 in Class 6 to 2003, I never attended Church. I survived death in February 12 2002, where I was on the top of a lorry, the lorry was climbing a hill,which the driver engaged a high gear, at the changing of gear the lorry could not receive the low gear, it started to reverse. Now the driver tensed and the lorry got an accident by turning it's heel upside down. Before it fell, however, something told me jump the opposite side and that's how I survived. Otherwise the driver and conductor were seriously injured. 

"In December 2003 this is where I came back to my senses and asked myself, how I am going to survive this life. At this time I was feeding myself, and a voice came to me in a dream at night telling me 'you have to change.' I think it was the spirit of my mother, because that night I cried a lot blaming God why he took my mother and father. And as from that night, I stopped smoking marijuana, and purposed to go back to Church. Glory to God!"

Francis recalls that just 16 years ago a lady friend of his late mother hired him to clear three acres of brush on her property. He was given a week to complete the job but he finished it in two days, greatly impressing his employer who rewarded him with 20,000 kshs ($240 in Canadian funds). He had never seen or touched that much money in his life.

The lady asked Frank what he intended to do with his earnings and he told her that he thought he might take a welding course and she agreed that would be an excellent idea. On the way to register for a welding course the next morning something seemed to tell him that he actually had enough money to get him started in high school and that he was still young enough to qualify. A friend subsequently re-directed him to a resource centre where he signed up for Form 1 (the first year of high school) and his high school education was under way.

It should be noted here that the average cost of one year in the Kenyan secondary school system during that period was ksh 30,000-40,000 and it did not take long for Francis to realize that he had a problem -- not enough money left over to buy food for the coming weeks. Not knowing what way to turn, he took his case to the school principal and was given permission to attend classes on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays so that he could earn money the other days of the week in order to survive.

Adding to his anxiety and frustration was the fact that his former marijuana-smoking friends continually harassed him saying that sooner or later he would quit school and return to his former ways, all of which made him work all the harder to prove them wrong.

To make matters worse, in April of 2005 he came down with a mystery illness (could not talk, hear, eat or drink) and was admitted to hospital where he spent several weeks in ICU fighting death while on a life-support machine. After a month of remarkable recovery his doctor came to his bedside one day and told him he had to leave the hospital because his bill had climbed to ksh 476,000.

Leave hospital he did and continue his education he did. Continuing to go to church on Sundays, he received Jesus as his personal savior and life started aligning itself for the determined teenager who would graduate from high school in 2007. He had been named student Christian Union chairman and his teachers referred to him as "pastor" which no doubt pleased him.  

Francis and crew work on current masonry job.

The dreadful stories of child labor in Kenya and the high cost of secondary education are well documented and continue to be controversial to this day, particularly with the advent of the COVID-19 pandemic. However, as he said, somehow, the strong, six-foot Francis managed to survive his early hardships and continues to work today as a stone mason because his church cannot afford to pay him sufficiently to feed his family. "The zeal I have for God makes me do anything for Him," is the way Francis explains it.

And, speaking of family, Francis has a wife (Elizabeth) and three children (son Lemuel, 7 and daughters Favor, 6 and Shalom,4).

As a rather comical aside, I asked him about his impression of politics and politicians in his homeland and he responded by saying: "I hate politics...God is my only polite politician."

Pastor Francis studies at the Common Ground Theological Institute and was to have been ordained after graduation in December, but that too has been put on hold due to the covid situation.

Francis and brother John in
 Sunday-go-to meeting best.

Still he faithfully forges ahead in bringing the message of God to his people and broadening his on line ministry. He has been hampered due to the lack of video equipment but has done amazingly well broadcasting a half dozen productions to date. He is looking forward to purchasing a proper video camera for live recording of his services and is "putting all trust in God."

In Frank's rather wistful words he adds "Though we are still on rental, in a single room, we are believing God to enlarge our territories. Purchase a small land and build a place for worship, but in the mean time if we get a tent we can hire some land...anyway all those are prayer items."

I am waiting for a very modest Frank to fill a few gaps in his story and he now seems to be on a roll, passing information on to me as it comes to mind. I have a feeling that he has never before been subjected to my North American newspaper type of questioning and I am taking it one step at a time so as not to overwhelm him. I'll report updates from him in future Wrights Lane and Facebook posts.

Background to religion in Kenya

Religion plays an important role in the life of most Kenyans. Many people will visit their place of worship both to practise their religion as well as to socialise with friends, family and acquaintances. It is common to find a syncretism between local and indigenous beliefs and practices with Christianity. Thus, religions in Kenya tend not to be mutually exclusive but instead may incorporate the beliefs and practices of one another.

The majority of the country identifies as Christian (82.1% of the population). More specifically, 47.7% identifies as Protestant, 23.4% identifies as Catholic, and 11.9% identifies with some other branch of Christianity. Of the remaining population, 11.2% identifies as Muslim, 1.7% identifies as traditionalists, 1.6% identifies as ‘other', 2.4% identifies as 2.4%, and 0.2% did not specify their religious affiliation.

There are a variety of branches of Christianity observed in the country. Christianity was introduced to Kenya when missionaries settled near Mombasa in 1844. In the early 20th century, many Kikuyu left the mission churches and schools to start their own, free from the control of missionaries. This history highlights the distinction in contemporary Kenya between the mainstream branches of Protestant and Catholic and the African Independent Churches. Charismatic forms of Christianity, such as Pentecostal churches, have gained popularity in recent years among urban dwellers. Members of various Christian churches usually coexist and interact peacefully. At times, different denominations may come together to partake in special prayer meetings.

In contemporary Kenya, Christianity is the most dominant religion and is an influential force in the country. Christian values and attitudes relating to the family and marriage have modified traditional practices (e.g. encouraging smaller families and phasing out the practice of polygamy). Going to church on Sunday is very common as churches are found throughout the country. It is also common to see religious icons and sacred spaces in people's homes, offices or vehicles. One central element of Christianity in Kenya is the use of music, rhythm, dancing and singing during their worship time.

NOTE: Presbyterian World Mission works in partnership with the Presbyterian Church of East Africa. The extensive PC(USA) Kenya Mission Network helps promote knowledge of and commitment to most effective partnership practices. World Mission encourages Kenya Mission Network members to engage in best practices of caring for orphans and vulnerable children, to support training of pastors, to support Women’s Guild work with marginalized persons, and to promote work of Presbyterian Church of East Africa in outreach and mission areas.

Francis Njuguna and his children Lemuel, Favor and Shalom.

TAKE IT OR LEAVE IT...THIS POST HAS NO HEADING

What follows is sure to be one of the most difficult posts I have ever written for Wrights Lane.

I do not know where I'm about to go with this...

And I do not have a ready ending in mind.

But here goes.

For all of my adult life I have had more than a passing interest in the Holy Bible. My last 30 years in fact have been devoted to some pretty serious study and theological research resulting in several terms as an ordained elder in Presbyterian Church in Canada and three stints of passing myself off as a lay preacher.

I don't mind admitting that I have struggled through the past three decades of my life, often doubting my faith and feeling inadequate and ill-equipped for church ministry. In the beginning I truly thought that I was answering "the call" so many have experienced, but ultimately wrestled with the possibility that I only heard what my Christian ego wanted me to hear?

There have been countless gratifying moments of spiritual inspiration and intervention, times when I saw the light and times when deep down I felt that I was sincerely sharing it with others. There were times too when I was overcome with the glory and wonder of it all. But in spite of that, I always seemed to feel uncomfortable with the very real possibility that any ministerial impact I may have had was minimal. Perhaps, in retrospect, my lack of self-assurance in a personal relationship with God was palpable...and others picked up on it.

Perhaps I was asking too much of God and of myself.

In the past couple of years, sensing the Grim Reaper creeping up on me, I increased my study of the bible because I was desperately looking for answers; not to mention the fact that I needed inspiration from the gospels for my pulpit-fill worship service assignments. And while I have not been actively preaching since the start of the current year, I have found it self-fulfilling to fill the void by passing on some of my biblical discoveries by means of Wrights Lane. Come to think of it, I have been so moved on occasion in recent months, that I have produced the equivalent of four or five sermons(?) a week, much to the disinterest of the majority of my readers I must admit.

It seems, however, that the more I delve into Bible study and the necessary research that follows, including referencing Hebrew translations, the more I have become confused. Perhaps "unsettled" is a better word, simply giving in to inadequacy in fully deciphering the complexity of what I was finding.

I am told that encounters with serious texts can indeed bring confusion and disillusionment for a constant religious neophyte like me. The disciplines demanded of students and the conclusions to which they are invited to arrive at are often very different from original expectations. The resultant tendency in scholarship for me has been to make the Testaments more remote than ever...Not at all what I had expected.

Chalk it up to learning deficiencies or an aging mind (possibly both), but the more I struggled to process and retain what I was learning, the more I became confused and uncomfortable with my limitations in comprehending it. Instead of making certain archaic pages of the Bible more intelligible, scholarship for me seemed to remove them to a more distant and inaccessible world, describable only in barbarous technical terms (eschato-logical, kerygmatic, traditio-historical) whose relevance in the 21st century is difficult to discern.  In the end I was unable to understand much of it to my satisfaction.

I found it not altogether consoling to read an explanation by religious scholar Brian E. Beck in his book Reading the New Testament Today: "What makes it (biblical study) all so much more difficult is that most of those who wish to study a part of the Bible have far more invested in it than other literature. They are likely to regard it as a supreme source of authoritative teaching about belief and behaviour...Hence, while people vary in their ability to make adjustments to their faith, very few can cope with major changes, particularly in later life. The more deeply the faith is held and the more completely life is built upon it, the more difficult it will be to accommodate shifts of perspective in it."

While I have sustained pride in being progressive and flexible in my beliefs, I find myself at a point where I have become bogged down in the complexities and contradictions of religious study, thereby my foundations have been disturbed and the whole edifice of my belief threatened. In good conscience I am now reluctant to write about it any further with required conviction, let alone speak publicly to a congregation looking to me for assurance and confirmation of long-held beliefs. It simply would not be right.

Likewise, I cannot be a pretender in any of my writings. I must have the courage of my convictions in striving for believability and acceptance by my publics or audiences.

The sad acknowledgement in all of this is that for centuries the attempt to learn more about the Bible was constructive and edifying. Readers of commentaries felt they were drawing water from deep wells, preachers discovering in them material for sermons, and ordinary Christians finding reading of the Bible illuminating and devotional life strengthened. Why should the Bible now become a book full of problems and unresolved difficulties, a challenge rather than a support for faith? The work of scholars easily appearing in the guise of a latter-day unbelieving assault upon convictions which have up to now stood the test of time.

Why can I/we not be satisfied today with an attitude toward the Bible which served our predecessors so well for 20 centuries?

God help me believe that it is a misrepresentation to suggest that the results of the last 200 years carried out by scholars in many countries have been only negative and destructive. In many ways our understanding of biblical times, of Jesus himself, and of the meaning of the sacred documents in their original setting and their potential significance for our times have certainly been immeasurably enhanced.

My time (if I ever had it) has passed. I no longer have the physical, mental or spiritual wherewithal to sort it all out and to make any kind of meaningful impact on lives other than my own. Sorry if my self-admitted inadequacies are showing, but that is the reality of it and I feel relief in the admission.

The hopeful news for me is that we can look to dedicated ministers of the word and sacrament with intelligence and youth on their side sufficient to carry us into a new generation of Christian faith. I think in particular about my good reverend friend, Dr. Randy Benson, who literally spent the first third of his life studying and earning degrees in theology, religion, science and philosophy and he's using it now by serving a small four-church co-op ministry in Central Grey Bruce. My hat is off to the dedication of church leaders like Randy whose faith has remained steadfast in less than ideal circumstances and in spite of dwindling church attendance in rural Ontario communities. 

Modern scholarship has brought out the individuality of those who have contributed to its composition, showing them as real human beings, wrestling with the problems of life in the church and the world, striving to hold on to, and to interpret their faith in changing times. It is at least easier to feel an affinity with these men and women, and to learn from them the meaning of Christian faith so many of us seek in today's world.

Anyway, that's the way I see it...This is my story and I'm compelled to stick to it.

It has not been easy to own up to certain limitations and I do it at anticipated personal risk. I may well slip a notch in some people's estimation of me. But I'm okay with where I stand religiously and I no longer feel entitled or compelled to take it beyond that. I stand at ease as a Christian foot soldier, where I belong as a common every day man.

So I guess that would be the unplanned end of my story. It crept up on me!

See you in church sometime folks -- maybe!...Ideally without a face mask.

WHEN ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS

We all have a well tuned sensor for when people mean what they say and it jars with us when their words and actions don’t match up.

The expression ‘talk is cheap?’ It’s a shortened version of the original saying which was ‘talk is cheap but it takes money to buy a farm.’ It basically means that it’s easy to talk, say nice things or make big promises but it takes much more to actually make things happen, to stay true to your word and actually achieve things.

Then there is another apt expression "What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say."

Overall, we’re judged by our actions rather than our words. They are what people remember. You may not be the most eloquent speaker in the world or be able to craft beautiful verses and love poems for your sweetheart, but it’s more important to show your love, your care and your dedication in your actions. This can be in kindnesses (big and small), thoughtful gestures, standing up for those weaker than ourselves and following through on our promises and plans.

Indeed. These days, we don't have to look past the morning news to find glaring examples of hypocrisy – the "do as I say, not as I do" condition that has plagued humanity throughout the ages. More than one-hundred years ago, a religious snob, who liked to appear full of virtue, said to Mark Twain, "Before I die, I'm going to make a pilgrimage to the Holy Land. I shall climb to the top of Mount Sinai and read the Ten Commandments aloud!" To which Twain replied, "I have a better idea! Why don't you stay right at home and keep them?"

THE WOES OF A WRITER WITH NOTHING TO WRITE ABOUT

Writing is an activity which has shaped our lives, and is the reason for the world being what it is today. For centuries people have used writing to convey information on what they have seen or heard, or to express their thoughts and ideas in a way which is limitless to say the least.

From my personal experience of writing in some way, shape or form, factually or creatively, on a regular basis for the past 60+ years, I have found that however I feel, whether forced or inspired, there is always something which manages to scribble itself on my page or computer monitor screen. Just by putting my thoughts on paper and writing whatever comes into my mind, something interesting always seems to manifest itself from nothing. Hence the ultimate form of communications comes into focus.

While it required a certain amount of grass-roots journalistic training, I cut my teeth on newspaper reporting which in my mind is the easiest from of writing. All that is required, really, is a "nose for news" or natural inquisitiveness for facts, and the ability to convey the news story or report in a clear and concise (balanced) manner. There is never a shortage of news, be it good or bad.

The most challenging form of writing, however, is creative writing (preferably with an end message) that evolved out of my newspaper career. Creative writing isn't just limited to novels, short stories, and poems; in fact this type of writing, all of which I have engaged in, encompasses at least a dozen different types, each suited to specific situations and kinds of personal expression.

There are many forms of writing that can become creative if they expand beyond the basic reporting of facts. For instance, some blog sites and literary journalism articles are very creative too and that is an area that I have concentrated on in the past few years; coupled with the publication of several books, religious texts and self-inspired (hopefully) motivational prose.

Human interest is always foremost in my mind and I have set a daily writing target for myself of at least 1,500 words, give or take a few hundred. In 12 years of blogging alone I have produced in excess of 1,700 posts...Multiply that by an average of 1,500 words per post and you get a feeling for the magnitude of my literary undertaking. Consider too that I devote between two and 10 hours to the development of most Wrights Lane posts and the projection is jaw-dropping even for me.

I find writing in general to be a most exhilarating and rewarding exercise, regardless of how my readers may perceive it. For me writing is a way of life with resultant therapeutic benefits. If I do not do it because of other life obligations or in periods when the creative well runs dry of necessary inspiration or, Heaven help me...I succumb to discouragement, I feel lost and directionless, almost without purpose. 

Granted, I have experienced magic moments when having a shower, mowing the lawn, sitting in an easy chair doing nothing in particular or in bed at night trying to go to sleep when suddenly... "EUREKA!", I've had the most surprising idea or thought about something most compelling. This is a common feeling to have when performing activities which require very little thought, such as mindfulness. When you detach yourself from tasks which are demanding on concentration and focus, such as watching a film or reading a book, your mind begins to wander. It is this wandering of the mind that helps writers rejuvenate, to think creatively and constructively about their compulsion to convert words and thoughts to written text.

Now, confession time!

I tackled this post earlier today because I felt a creative blight coming on. For the first time in quite a few weeks I lacked inspirational wherewithal leaving me with nothing meaningful on which to expound. It was an unsettling, empty feeling and again I found myself out of sorts and disturbingly non-productive.

As I have done on such occasions in the past, I finally resorted a few hours ago to just sitting at a blank computer, letting my mind wander. And wander it did, into the never-never land of neck-breaking slumber.

When I groggily awoke 45 minutes later and was able to gather my bearings, I eased myself up from the still idle computer to get life back in my stiffened limbs -- and to make a cup of decaf coffee.

As I waited for the coffee to brew in the kitchen, two opposing  schools of thought ran through my mind. 1) Just go back to the computer and start writing about the first thing that comes to mind. And 2) When you have nothing to write about don't write anything.

Dutifully, I returned to the sleeping, blank computer monitor  screen and started writing about the first thing that came to mind. It is now 1:30 a.m. and I have been writing, editing, deleting -- and thinking -- for the better part of four hours.

Mission accomplished too! I kind of feel rejuvenated.

And to think that I just spent the entire evening and I have absolutely not written about anything. Or did I? Doesn't matter.

In retrospect, I listened to two seemingly conflicting voices and sometimes something as incidental as that is all it takes to prime the pump; or to my way of thinking -- whatever it takes to live to write another day.

NOAH AND THE ARK OF ATONEMENT

Pitch: a thick, black, lustrous, and sticky substance obtained by boiling down tar. It is used in calking the seams of ships; also in coating rope, canvas, wood, ironwork, etc., to preserve them.

When God instructed Noah to build the ark, He commanded him to pitch it within and without with pitch (Gen 6:14). In English, this seems like a simple technical description. However, the Hebrew reveals a mysterious element connected to the Day of Atonement, which is not-too-coincidentally celebrated this week.

While many people consider the story of Noah's Ark merely an instructive myth or parable about God's punishment for man's wickedness, others believe that the story is historically accurate. To them, Noah's tale describes events that really happened only a few thousand years ago.

Similar to several other early Old Testament writings, I have been studiously attempting to wrap my mind around the Noah and the Great Flood story and, as usual, have had to refer to original Hebrew interpretations for a degree of clarification.

A plausible ark? Let's plunge into the story a little bit.

While we know the chemistry of polyurethane we
can’t know about the properties of the pitch used
on the Ark. Nowadays, we think of pitch derived
from oil or coal, but European shipbuilders sealed
vessels for many centuries by using pine-tree resin.

The word for “pitch” (Hebrew translation: 

kopher) in Genesis is different from that used in other places in the Old Testament. It is equivalent to the Hebrew kaphar (“to cover”) and, in the noun form, means simply a “covering.”

However, it is also the regular Hebrew word for “atonement,” as in Leviticus 17: 11, for example. In essence, therefore, this is the first mention of “atonement” in the Bible. Whatever the exact nature of this “pitch” may have been, it sufficed as a perfect protective covering for the Ark, to keep out the waters of judgment, just as the blood of the Lamb provides a perfect atonement for the soul. Ah, a hint no doubt!

The earliest form of quarantine

Recently, a striking image has circulated on Facebook. It is a depiction of Noah’s Ark being tossed by the waves in a storm with the statement “first quarantined family.” If you know the biblical account of Noah’s Ark, then you will know that Noah and his family, eight people total, were chosen by God to be saved from His judgement on the earth. This judgement came in the form of a flood, and Noah and his family were “quarantined” inside the ark.

Most of us can begin to relate to what Noah must have felt quarantined inside of the ark. Just as we are sheltering in place to preserve human life, God quarantined Noah and his family, along with two of every kind of living creature, inside the ark to save their lives. There are many parallels that can be created from the biblical account of Noah to our present time in COVID quarantine:

-- Noah and his family were separated and isolated
-- Noah and his family’s lives were threatened and the way to stay safe was to go into the ark and into “quarantine”
-- Noah tried to save the lives of others through his actions and lifestyle
-- Noah and his family placed their trust in the Lord despite the circumstances
-- Noah and his family experienced the separation that comes from death and would experience grief
-- Noah and his family worked during their “quarantine” caring for the animals, the ark, and each other knowing they would eventually leave the ark
-- Noah and his family praised the Lord for His goodness and love when the waters receded, and they were able to leave the ark

The parallels are certainly interesting to think about but we cannot overlook the fact that God, a loving and merciful God, does bring judgement upon those who oppose him (James 4:6), but he always provides a way for the righteous to escape (Psalm 55:16). Perhaps the greatest parallel we can see in our current situation is the significance of 1 Peter 3:18-20:

"For Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh, but made alive in the spirit, in which he went and proclaimed to the spirits in prison, because they formerly did not obey, when God’s patience waited in the days of Noah, while the ark was being prepared, in which a few, that is, eight persons, were brought safely through water."

Sin had almost completely corrupted the culmination of God’s creation -- man. But Genesis 6:8 tells us that “Noah found favor in the eyes of the Lord.”

For 120 years, at the command of God, Noah (it is said he lived to be more than 600 years old) labored to build the ark. The ark provided a means of escape for Noah and his family who sought to serve God, instead of falling into the binding and destructive chains of sin. This ark-building was Noah’s ministry. 

Noah warned others of the impending judgement and invited them to be saved by boarding the ark with him. Sadly, Scripture tells us that no one, aside from his family, accepted his invitation to salvation. Only eight people were saved from the flood through the ark (Genesis 7:7).

Following the flood, humanity continued to populate the earth and a nation was formed and set apart to be God’s people (Genesis 12:2). However, because sin was brought into the world through Adam and Eve’s disobedience (Genesis 3), mankind continued its path of sin and separation from God until finally, God made a way for humanity to be permanently saved. God sent His son, Jesus, as the propitiation for the sin of all mankind (1 John 2:2). Webster’s 1828 Dictionary defines propitiation as “the atonement or atoning sacrifice offered to God to assuage his wrath and render him propitious sinners.” Simply put, through Jesus we are restored to right standing with God who is ready to forgive sins and bestow blessings upon us.

Jesus’ ministry, culminating in his death and resurrection, is a parallel to the days of Noah: again, the enemy thought he had won the war for mankind by sentencing Jesus to death on the cross. Instead, Jesus’s death brought eternal victory! Jesus is sitting at the right hand of the Father and is the way of salvation for all who believe. Philippians 2:9-10 says, “Therefore God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow.”

Just as the ark saved Noah and his family from God’s righteous judgement, the cross of Jesus is a means of salvation today. Just as Noah and his family boarded the ark and God shut the door to shield them from judgement and death, Jesus offers himself as the door of salvation.

"I am the door. If anyone enters by me, he will be saved." (John 10:9)

NOTE FROM DICK: Sorry folks, that's the best I can do. Still more questions than answers, but there is a limit to my aging mind and simplistic theological study. Wish I could do better!

Good thing I'm not out for ratings, right!? 

ABORTION: LET'S CLEAR BLOOD FROM OUR HANDS

I am sickened by some of the supposedly Christian talk coming up from south of the boarder allegedly affixing "blood on the hands" of pro-choice advocates and voters. Extremist feelings like that do far more harm than good and accomplish nothing other than widening the gap between two factions, both believing that they are morally right.

Let's be honest. How many truthful, heartfelt conversations have you had in your entire life with friends or family about abortion? And no, I’m not going to elaborate on the aforementioned political conversations (which can get pretty mean and spirited) preliminary to the upcoming and controversial election in the United States and the one we just suffered through in Canada. I’m talking about genuine, transparent, and intimate conversations about personal lives. 

In reading a number of recent studies it has become clear to me that if you want to save unborn life, then improving the conditions of conception, birth, and post-natal life for mother, father, and child are vitally important. This is how real clear-thinking people work through abortion questions:

North Americans surely can focus much of their attention on abortion’s preconditions, alternatives, and aftereffects. We've heard contemplations such as, What was the nature of the relationship between conceiving partners? Was it consensual? How did they approach pregnancy prevention, if at all? Was there sufficient knowledge about potential outcomes? What kinds of support (financial, relational) are available to people facing unplanned pregnancies? What are the stages of prenatal development? What health situations would put a mother or baby at risk? What does it take to raise a child (financially, parentally)? What impact does having a child have on professional aspirations, or on reputation, or on permanent ties between conceiving partners? What roles do (or can) men and women play in parenthood? How accessible is a choice like adoption? What are the conditions of children in foster care? The list of well-taken questions is virtually endless.

The point here is that extreme opinions on myriad social issues and corollary personal decisions frame attitudes well beyond the procedural “yes/no” or “right/wrong” of an abortion decision.

Amidst the clamor that deepens divisions, it’s easy to forget one of the greatest Ten Commandments which is to "love God and each other." I wish we loved enough to stop demonizing on the abortion issue, once and for all.

What if we stopped the othering rhetoric and started over with something we all agree is solidly Christian, a humble confession: We all have blood on our hands.

Maybe then we could work together, despite our differences, in the life-giving spirit of that greatest commandment...Love!

PICKED UP IN PASSING...

Something about this quote resonates with me.

“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself. When you are born a lotus flower, be a beautiful lotus flower, don’t try to be a magnolia flower. If you crave acceptance and recognition and try to change yourself to fit what other people want you to be, you will suffer all your life. True happiness and true power lie in understanding yourself, accepting yourself, having confidence in yourself.”

~~ Ulrich Leonard Tölle is a spiritual teacher and best-selling author. He is a German-born resident of Canada best known as the author of The Power of Now and A New Earth: Awakening to Your Life's Purpose. In 2008, The New York Times called Tolle "the most popular spiritual author in the United States". In 2011, he was listed by Watkins Review as the most spiritually influential person in the world. Unusual Note: Tolle is not identified with any particular religion, but he has been influenced by a wide range of spiritual works. He divides his time traveling between his home in British Columbia and the United States.

IMMEDIATE FUTURE FOR PHYSICAL CONTACT IS IN QUESTION...AND WHAT WILL REPLACE IT?

Certain activities and practices we engage in as a society are very often overlooked. However, there are some that we all engage in that can truly benefit our sense of joy in life. Hugs were invented far back in the primordial era of man, when the only thing that stood between humanity and the cold, dark wilderness was the comfort of our own kind.  Hugging as we know it today has been shown to not only affect our happiness, but also our health, positively influencing our cognitive and emotional capacities, as well as physical markers such as blood pressure and heart rate. Engaging in authentic, prolonged hugs allows people to feel connected, happy, and healthy. Best of all, it’s easy, free and enjoyable.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Growing up as an only child, I was a reserved and painfully shy young man who had to grow into suppressed emotions and feelings that surged through my post puberty body. There were times when this natural evolution was an awkward and painful one.

I came by hugging and any kind of physical touch with a degree of reluctance until at some magic point in my life I realized that I actually liked outward demonstrations of affection and personal acknowledgement -- and so did most others. Things like shaking hands, hugging and friendly pats on the back ultimately became second nature to me.

Having cultivated personal closeness and touch for a good two-thirds of my life, it is now unsettling to think that with COVID-19 in its eighth month it's not a surprise that even the simplest joys — like hugs — are now under threat of disappearing.

Will hugs and handshakes become obsolete for good — another part of our new normal? Scientists fear more of us are starving for touch, another unfortunate outcome of the pandemic.

Touch is the fundamental language of connection and in the wake of social isolation from the pandemic, many of us are experiencing touch deprivation — a serious problem that can negatively impact our immune system, make us less empathetic and unbearably lonely.

It can be especially hard for seniors in nursing homes and those in the hospital sick without the ability to have visitors. By placing six-foot barriers between us and everyone else, we may be preventing the spread of infection but we're also preventing the spread of human connection, something that we're all hardwired for and it's playing a major role in our unhappiness.

Since skin is the largest organ in the body with billions of cells that process information constantly — each fingertip, for example, has over 3,000 receptors — when we hug or feel a friendly touch on our skin, our brains release oxytocin.

Affectionately known as the "cuddle hormone," oxytocin sends out signals to our brains flooding us with positive, feel-good sensations of trust, emotional bonding and social connection, perhaps more importantly right now, it also decreases fear and anxiety responses.

I could go on at length expounding on human need for physical contact, but I am sure that you already understand that.

Unfortunately, since the lockdown happened rather quickly, we went from all to nothing overnight. Whether it was shaking a coworker's hand or hugging a friend, most of us were accustomed to some level of platonic physical touch on a daily basis.

There very definitely is potential to become forever paranoid as a result of all of this. I met up with a dear friend at a funeral reception (limited to 50 people) a week or so ago. After chatting for a few minutes and without thinking, I acted on the impulse to touch her arm as I departed. Instantly, we found ourselves engaged in a full-fledged hug. It happened that naturally and easily.

Neither one of us spoke another word, but I am sure we were both left wondering: "My God what have I just done?" Two extremely distance conscious people guilty of momentarily living dangerously...And who knows, we very well might have been.

Do I believe hugs and handshakes will become obsolete? My answer is hopefully no but with a small caveat.

Platonic and romantic touch will always be in high demand. We humans are hardwired to seek it out. But I do think that until there is a vaccine, the way we interact with strangers, co-workers and friends in the short and long term will change.

We've already started to form habits that exclude handshakes and we only hug people in our small bubble, and not just as a general rule for anyone who used to hug everyone they met.

And, the thing with habits is that they normalize, and our brain changes to support those habits.

So, if this is our new normal, it may become our forever normal. But I do believe touch is entrenched in our humanity, and right now we need empathy and hugs and outstretched hands more than ever before.

Sadly, we are not getting it. Some of us in our twilight may well never experience it again.

Even more sadly, we know what we are missing!

IS TRUE LOYALTY POSSIBLE? ANSWER: YES BUT WITH CERTAIN ALLOWANCES AND CONSIDERATIONS

Let me underline the fact that it is undoubtedly a comfortable feeling that there are certain people who are loyal friends on whom we can rely, whatever happens in our life. No question, loyalty is a personal trait that is to be highly admired and cherished.

But at the same time, I have to wonder if absolute loyalty, like absolute altruism, is incompatible with natural laws.

Traditionally, we swear an across-the-board oath of ever-lasting faith in our Creator God followed by an oath (vow) of eternal loyalty to a spouse, our country and even members of certain social organizations. But, in reality, how often are these oaths really respected over the course of an eventful lifespan?

Truthfully, we cannot fulfill such commendable oaths if loyalty is based only on a feeling of obligation or duty as is very often the case, frequently overriding the original purpose of providing support, warmth and friendship in human relations. 

It is not too far off topic to reveal that on several occasions in the past I ignorantly expressed or justified loyalty on the basis that I was doing it out of an over-blown sense of obligation -- or duty -- when in reality that was only partially true in view of the fact that there was also deep love in my heart at the same time. I just expressed it awkwardly and insensitively and in retrospect sincerely wish I had an opportunity to take back those words, if only the dear souls were still alive to understand that love, not duty, was my main motivation in the primary care I was giving.

It is so easy to confuse love from the bottom of one's heart with duty and commitment when considering this rather complex subject.

So why must we formalize faithfulness by a solemn oath or promise anyway? Back to that in a moment.

Just over a century ago, Sir Winston Churchill left the Conservative party in Britain and joined the Liberals. The story is told that, upon hearing her husband criticized as a "turncoat," Lady Churchill remarked, "I prefer my husband to be loyal to his ideals and not to a party that is no longer loyal to them."

To my mind you can decide to be loyal to a god or an ideal under all circumstances but there is room for caution when making this kind of promise to an individual. God remains steadfast, people can and do change. Just as you cannot love on command (or demand), you cannot be loyal on command without exposing yourself to the distress of following a code of behavior in which you no longer believe. If you try to do it, you either develop inferiority complexes because of your failure or you become miserable by acting in a manner that does run contrary to your nature. 

I ride the fence on the idea that loyalty should be absolute and unchanging to the point of wondering if it is actually unnatural to a degree. I harken back to a period in history where great rulers who eventually became powerless advocates of a lost cause often formally relieved their subjects, and in particular their soldiers, of their oaths of loyalty to spare them unnecessary guilt and suffering. 

The same is true of a wise spouse who does not object to separation or divorce when the relationship becomes manifestly untenable. It is better to amputate a badly infected dying limb than to hang on to it until it kills you, mainly because it is yours.

The guilt of a broken vow too weighs heavily and has long-lasting implications. I think that separations and divorces, marital in particular, are generally the saddest, most devastating things that can happen in anyone's life...So is maintaining a relationship out of a sense of obligation and long after the bloom is off the rose.

Is there anything more pathetic than putting up a good front and pretending out of a sense of duty or, worse yet, to save face for whatever reasons.

I pray that I should never become so jaded as to even imagine a society where we no longer swear fidelity even to God, apple pie and motherhood.

But in today's world I can't help but wonder...sometimes. Heaven help us if we arrive at a point where we cannot put faith in so-called permanent institutions. Still bad things happen because life is like that and we have to be prepared to face the worst with reasoned rationality and resolution.

Bottom line, do not take loyalty and associated oaths and vows lightly. We're talking about the glue that traditionally holds relationships together, or at least makes one think twice when inevitable uncertainty enters the picture. 

Let your avowed love and sense of commitment (not to be confused with obligation) develop naturally and surely. If you are fortunate and it is predestined, you will live with your loyalty in tact for a long and glorious rest of your life.