THE UP AND DOWN SIDES OF LIVING ALONE IN YOUR 80'S

Ahhh, that's what I'm talking about!

Yes, there is an upside to being single and in your 80's. Especially after spending the lion's share of the last 25 years being a primary caregiver for two terminally ill wives.

Initially, you feel that you have lost a part of yourself and dangerously without purpose. You look for new meaning and it comes by degrees and in unexpected ways.

Once you exhaust bouts of debilitating grief and adjust to a lifestyle that you had completely forgotten about, life tends to take on a more relaxed and selfish type of existence. You become foot-loose and fancy-free, almost like a teenager, but with a depleted body, nowhere in particular to go and no one in particular to do it with.

You have absolutely nothing holding you back -- except money. Within reason, you can do what you want and when you want. Meals are the easiest...You can eat on whim and indulge yourself with favorite foods. Getting creative with leftovers is one of my specialties, but heretofore I would not subject them to anyone else, especially the better half.

With just yourself and a dog floating around, the house really never gets messy, providing you make a habit of putting things back after you use them. The only time you have to dust or vacuum is when you're expecting company, which can be very rare if you are careful to not invite anyone.

Hey, and another thing...The TV remote control is all yours!

Now the downside. And there is a downside to just about everything, isn't there?

For me, nothing drives home the feeling of loneliness more than seeing other couples in my age bracket out shopping together or enjoying a leisurely bite to eat at a local restaurant or coffee shop. At times like that I have learned to remind myself that I am seeing them at their best...What I am not seeing is what goes on behind the closed doors of their homes -- disagreement, anxiety, normal frustrations and old-fogeyism that goes with the territory. 

Many elderly people, especially those that live alone like me, find satisfaction and a sense of companionship in interactions with a pet. Caring for a pet can give people a sense of purpose and connectedness. I honestly do not know what I would do without my girl Matilda (pug, terrier cross) and her unconditional tie to me, literally speaking. She's connected to my hip and only surgery will remove her. I don't mind a bit.

I function well in solitude and being left to my own resources. When I feel like talking I know that I have Matilda's ear...She's a good listener.  She also keeps me warm at night when I am cold...She snuggles up and gives me a lick when she senses that I am depressed or troubled.

But when you stop to think about it, it is a sad state of affairs when an animal is your only source of love and affection. We all need human interaction, up front and personal, in our lives. By another name, it is called intimacy and there is no substitute for it.

No one outgrows the need for emotional closeness that only intimacy with a special soul-mate can bring.

Let's not mince words. As we age our ability to engage in rockets-in-the-sky intimate sex wanes. But in meaningful relationships husbands and wives find new and different ways of "doing it" and meeting each other's natural needs. And it can be a wonderful thing that is awarded, sadly, to the more fortunate.

That special look in the eye of a lover, or lifetime companion, never diminishes. Likewise a touch, a hug or embrace -- shared words of affection spoken out of the blue, just because someone cares. Opportunities to vent innermost insecurities and concerns, things you would never divulge to anyone else...Those are the things a surviving spouse misses most.

In reality, you lose a marital partner twice...the first time when physical health circumstances incapacitate the other and finally when death delivers the last disconnect. It's a lose, lose situation.

Someone once said you never miss something until you don't have it any more. I've used that line once before lately on Wrights Lane.

Better to not dwell on what we don't have -- or have lost. Better to be thankful for the things we still have and to embrace the unexpected that may just be around the next corner. Make new relationships and nurture the ones you've got.

...And let the precious time remaining take its course, come what may. Not that you can do a hell of a lot about it anyway.

ATTENTION YOUNG PEOPLE, O YE OF RAGING HORMONES WITH LIFE STILL TO LIVE: This too can happen to you...And probably will!

WHAT'S THAT?

I am continually impressed with the innovative programs coming out of the Bruce County Museum and Culture Centre, directly across from my home backing on to Fairy Lake in Southampton. The latest is an impressive new kids TV series "What's That?" which will be aired on our local Eastlink television channel.

Similar to the old Art Linkletter TV show "Kids Say the Darndest Things" that asked young children for their views on the world, What’s That? features children from 4 to 10 years of age whose imagination and youth are just right for ‘unusual’ answers.

The series produced locally, was the brainchild of well-known figure skating coach Janet Dawson and Bruce County Playhouse producer Leslie McNamara working with Eastlink’s Betty Uiselt and teacher Tina Hrinivich. Together, the foursome came up with the idea of working with the Bruce County Museum & Cultural Centre where the entire series is being filmed.

Artifacts are brought out of the Museum’s historic collection and the young students are then able to examine them and arrive at their conclusions as to what the items are and what their purpose was. Many of the answers drawn from the young imaginations are brilliant and innovative as well as entertaining.

The series premiered at the Museum this past Saturday, February 23rd, with all the trappings of an Oscar production including the red carpet. For the young performers, it was their first chance to see themselves on the ‘big screen’, along with the many family and friends who were in attendance. 

“This is a wonderful opportunity for young students to learn about history and be engaged in the process,” said Deputy Mayor Don Matheson. “As a teacher, I think this is a great initiative and would definitely like to see more of this kind of thing.”

As with any production, students from surrounding elementary schools were required to audition. There will be six productions in the series with approximately 12 students per production. Open auditions will be continuing, with the next show on Saturday, March 2nd. I'll try to be there, living vicariously, because once again I was born 70 years too soon.

I HAVE BECOME A SLAVE TO THE HISTORY OF OLD QUILTS OF ANY KIND

A typical quilting bee, still happening today.

I made the unforgivable mistake this past week of linking controversial underground railroad quilts with the recent introduction of barn quilts that are now showing up in rural countryside settings across the U.S. and Canada. In truth, I was not really comparing apples and apples when I mentioned a *book dealing with UGRR codes, but it seemed that way at least to the administrator of a virtual history group to which I often make contributions.

You have to be cognizant of sensitivities when dealing with history and historians in general.

I will attempt to start at the beginning, as Yogi Berra would say, of a story that on the surface is somewhat convoluted.

Quilts by nature are warm and comfortable.  After all, what is a bed without a soft, billowy quilt to cover us on cold winter nights. There is just something about a colourful hand-made quilt that is inviting, cozy and conducive to rest. But quilts can also tell stories. No need to open a book, we can simply open a quilt to find out what stories these beautiful bed coverings have to share.

Quilts are a narrative part of many cultures.

Historically, traditional quilts were made by hand. In many cases in the not-too-distant past, groups of friends and neighbors would gather to work on one quilt together. This greatly reduced the amount of time it would have taken one person to make a quilt. These social gatherings were known as “quilting bees."

The materials for traditional quilts came from many sources. Often the cloth used to make the blankets came from familiar items, such as clothing. From the choice of material to the design and pattern quilts can tell stories about the time period in which they were made and the people who made them.

One very dear type of quilt is the friendship quilt. Friendship quilts are made as a gift of remembrance. They can be given to a friend or relative, commemorate a wedding or a new baby. Sometimes they are given to a friend who is moving away. Typically, a friendship quilt is made up of different squares. Each of these friendship blocks is signed by one of the friends and quilters. Sometimes the blocks may include the date or a personal message, too. In this way, friendship quilts are a bit like modern-day scrapbooks.

David Gray tells the story of his wartime quilt,
complete with press clippings.

Another popular traditional pattern for quilts is known as the "log cabin" pattern. Quilters have been creating log cabin quilts since the mid-1800s. The pattern became very popular during the Civil War when log cabin quilts were auctioned and sold to raise money for troops, many finding their way into Canada as well as being made here by early settlers.

During WW2 ladies guilds and church organizations made quilts for wounded Canadian soldiers in British hospitals. The quilts would feature countless names of well-wishing family and friends and were distributed by the Red Cross. I recently published another story on Wrights Lane about a personal friend David Gray (seen in the photo to the left) who, along with a brother and sister, worked on one of those wartime quilts as a youngster growing up in Galt, ON. Names to be sewn on the quilt were sold in advance at a neighborhood garden party. After 70 years the quilt quite remarkably found its way back into Grey family possession after numerous stops for periods of time in both England and Canada, thanks in part to the Canadian Red Cross.

Interestingly, the unique history and powerful symbolism of quilt patterns has now moved from cloth to the sides of barns on specially designated rural trails all across the country. The mission of the barn quilt initiative is to protect, preserve, interpret and develop unique natural, historical and cultural resources for the benefit of present and future generations

As I say, the quilt is a symbol of comfort and family. Barns are symbols of our heritage and community. What would be better than combining the two and creating a visual image of who we are and where we come from. This Art Movement began in 2001 and has spread rapidly as symbolic of heritage.

The purpose of the project has been to extend murals into the rural parts of our communities, bringing a diverse group of people together to create works of art that showcase our culture and history in a new and interesting way.

To be precise, barn quilts are large, squares of colorful wooden blocks with a brilliantly painted quilt pattern that is mounted on the front or side of a barn. Most measure 8’ X 8’. There have been some Barn Quilts that are one single sheet and slightly smaller and they are acceptable too as are painted barn quilts placed on another type of building as long as they fit all other requirements for submission.

Colourful barn quilts in downtown Dresden, ON.

I think that my hometown of Dresden was the first in Southern Ontario to actually place barn quilt murals on the side of a downtown brick building -- five in all -- each one commemorating a founding father, including the much heralded former escaped slave Josiah Henson. Dresden and the neighboring Dawn-Euphemia Township are now part of an officially acknowledged Barn Quilt Trail system.

"To be clear the quilt trail idea was something we did not come up with because of the *book. . .and it was not informed by the book (more about that later)," said town historian and Quilt Trail program member Marie Carter. "Two of the patterns were chosen because of the Black population here in Dresden -- or more specifically, two distinct communities of Blacks -- the Pennsylvania and Ohio Freemen and the Freedom Seekers (former slaves) who were involved with the British American Institute. The symbols chosen were selected because they are so universally linked to the story of the UGRR." 

In offering what amounts to a disclaimer, Marie explained "It has long been an aim of mine to ensure that Black pioneers at Dresden are recognized well beyond the UGRR story. And the quilt panels in this section of the trail intend to do that by acknowledging them as early 'founders' who developed over 1/2 of the town's original geography."

NOW ENTER THE SUBJECT OF UNDERGROUND RAILROAD QUILTS:

The idea of quilts being used in the Underground Railroad for purposes other than bedding was not mentioned either in the written documents of the period or in the interviews given years later. That is not to say they could not have been used in a form not discussed. However, I have come to understand that care must be taken not to romanticize this possibility.

To quote quilt historian Xenia Cord, "Quilt research and quilt history often rely heavily on the oral anecdotes and oral memories of quilters, stories that link women with common interests to a body of shared information. This information, strongly buttressed by written memoirs, documented sources, pictures, tangible artifacts, and previously published research allows the historian to contribute to the body of knowledge that is American quilt history."

"Occasionally a theory is presented that offers an engaging view of the past; the theory may not have substance and may not be documentable in any scholarly way, but it provides a vehicle through which we believe we can understand our past. This is the case with studies that supposedly reveal hidden codes or messages in quilts. A number of popularly disseminated misunderstandings about the role of quilts prior to the Civil War in the preparation and escape of fugitive slaves, and in the Underground Railroad are at present being taught to children."

In 1989, Stitched from the Soul by Gladys-Marie Fry was published. In it, she offered a glimpse into the lives and creativity of African American quilters during the era of slavery. It was the first book to examine the history of quilting in the enslaved community and to place slave-made quilts into historical and cultural context. Unfortunately, the author did not confirm any of the family stories given with the quilts, so the book is riddled with inaccuracies and misplaced dates.

Also in 1989, children's book author Deborah Hopkinson heard a story on National Public Radio about an art quilt exhibit by African-American quilters. The interview was discussing the symbolism in the quilts, which inspired her to write a story indicating that a quilt may have been used as a signaling device in the Underground Railroad. Deborah Hopkinson was unable to find any documentation for this theory and so wrote her book Sweet Clara and the Freedom Quilt with a fictional quilt. Her book was published in 1993. This book was later listed as a reference for Hidden in Plain View as was Stitched from the Soul.

Ten years later, the book *Hidden in Plain View further explored the theory of quilts being used in the Underground Railroad. Hidden in Plain View was written by Jacqueline Tobin, a Women's Studies professor at the University of Denver, assisted by Raymond Dobard, an Art History teacher at Howard University. The book documented her discussions with Ozella McDaniel Williams between 1993 and 1997. 

Ozella Wiliams was an African-American quilt store owner in a Charleston SC tourist market. Her professed goal was to ensure that her families' oral history of a quilt code, which had been passed down to her through the generations, was "written down." This code was evidentially a mnemonic device, used to help illiterate slaves memorize directions and activities they may have needed for escape. Ironically, Ms Williams family never used this code to effect their escape. In fact, in later interviews with some family members, they denied knowing anything at all about this "family story."

• It was this *publication, recently introduced to me by a friend, that I recommended to the aforementioned virtual history group in the form of an ill-advised post with a passing mention of the barn quilts on display in downtown Dresden. Plain and simply, I thought the book was a fascinating read and was totally unaware of the controversy surrounding it. Certainly, I did not intend to suggest that "Hidden in Plain View" in any way inspired the Dresden initiative.

The code related in the book associated quilt block names with their shape, style and color as hidden messages for slaves escaping the Charleston SC area. The origin of the code and how the meaning of the code was communicated between slaves was not explored. Each block, when made into a quilt, would pass on part of the message. These messages were contained in a series of 17 quilts. Where the slaves found the time to make these quilts, or what fabric they used, was never explained.

Many of the quilt blocks named in the book were not given their names until the early 1900's. Another block referenced was the "bear paw" block, meant to warn slaves of the bears in the Appalachian Mountains through which they must escape. Come to find out that this is problematic because slaves escaping Charleston would not normally take the longer and more dangerous route through the mountains when a shorter, easier route was available. In addition, bears east of the Mississippi had been nearly killed off from over hunting. In 1872, Underground Railroad conductor William Still published a book detailing his activities which indicated that slaves escaping Charleston typically took the coastal route.

So is the story related in Hidden in Plain View completely untrue? It's impossible to say but it is worth noting that the authors have cautioned against believing the story as fact, indicating on page 33 that their findings are "informed conjecture" and cautioning that the quilt code story was meant to be a mnemonic device, not an actual code placed in a quilt. They admit that the blocks shown in their book were only illustrative devices and not meant to be taken literally.

Jacqueline Tobin

According to an article in the July 2, 2007 US News and World Report, "Tobin believes her book has been misinterpreted. Numerous details ascribed to the story—like hanging quilts along the way to indicate safe houses—"simply aren't in the book," she says. Moreover, "We make it clear that this was Ozella's story only," she says, and that such codes "could have" been used in this way and only on one particular plantation. "We're not talking about hundreds or thousands of folks using this code," says Tobin. "The story has grown in ways that we had not intended."

Much to my surprise, Jacqueline Tobin who visited the Dresden area numerous times while researching her book, is a member of the same Dresden Virtual History Group that I belong to, so I'm looking forward to getting to know her better in coming weeks. To date she has not responded to my Facebook "friend" request, however, but she did thank me for my interest in Hidden in Plain View.

Again, were quilts used as a signaling device in the Underground Railroad? Certainly a quilt could have been used to signal a safe house, as could any other common household object. Keeping in mind that most escaping slaves traveled at night, however, it is unlikely that they were told to look for something as suspicious as a quilt hanging on a line overnight or a quilt with a specific pattern of blocks.

In conclusion, take my word for it friend, never -- and I repeat NEVER -- in the same breath confuse a Jacqueline Tobin underground railroad quilt (if there ever was such a thing) with the barn quilt creations you see when travelling through Southern Ontario this summer. One certainly did not inspire the other, at least not in Dresden's case, I've been assured. They are two different things, even though they represent the traditional quilt we all know and love and may even commemorate an Underground Railroad fugitive or two.

Interestingly, Tobin and my virtual history friend Marie Carter have met on several occassions, taking trips together through Kent County and Dawn-Euphemia Township when Hidden in Plain View was being researched. Tobin has since produced a follow-up book From Midnight to Dawn: the Last Tracks of the Underground Railroad, which I have yet to get my hands on...but when I do I don't think I'll talk about it on the Dresden Virtual History site.


Several of the barn quilt panels on the side of a building in downtown Dresden. Click on the image to enlarge the view.

PROFOUND WORDS WRITTEN BY MY GRANDMOTHER IN FAMILY BIBLE

Bible inscription by Louise Wright (1860-1932): "Strew gladness in the path of men, you will not pass this way again." 

I was flipping through a 140-year-old family bible, as I am wont to do on occasion, and paused to read a front page inscription (see above) written by my grandmother Louise Wright, some time in 1895. Realizing that this was not a quotation from the bible itself, I could not help but wonder where my grandmother found those profound words and perhaps more importantly, who first uttered them and in what form.

Louise (Reddick) Wright

The answer to those probing questions, as it turned out, was not all that easy to find. Initially, I discovered that my grandmother's inscription may have been a shortened version of the original: "I expect to pass through this world but once. Any good, therefore, that I can do or any kindness I can show to any fellow creature, let me do it now. Let me not defer or neglect it for I shall not pass this way again.'

This, and variants of it, have been been widely circulated as a Quaker saying since at least 1869, and attributed to Stephen Grellet since at least 1893. W. Gurney Benham in Benham's Book of Quotations, Proverbs, and Household Words (1907) states that though sometimes attributed to others, "there seems to be some authority in favor of Stephen Grellet being the author, but the passage does not appear in any of his printed works." It appears to have been published as an anonymous proverb at least as early as 1859, when it appeared in Household Words: A Weekly Journal, an English weekly magazine edited by Charles Dickens in the 1850s.

It has also often been attributed to the more famous Quaker William Penn, as well as others including Mahatma Gandhi and Ralph Waldo Emerson.

Stephen Grellet (2 November 1773 – 16 November 1855) was a prominent French-born American Quaker missionary. Interestingly, he was born Étienne de Grellet du Mabillier in Limoges, the son of a counsellor of King Louis XVI. Raised as a Roman Catholic, he was educated at the Military College of Lyons, now the Institut d'études politiques de Lyon, and at the age of 17 he entered the personal guard of the king. During the French Revolution he was sentenced to be executed, but escaped and eventually fled Europe to the United States in 1795.

Stephen Grellet

Impressed by the writings of William Penn, George Fox, and Quaker beliefs, in 1796 Grellet joined the Society of Friends. He became involved in extensive missionary work across North America and most of the countries of Europe, in prisons and hospitals, and was respectfully granted meetings with many rulers and dignitaries, including Pope Pius VII, Czar Alexander I, and the Kings of Spain and Prussia. He encouraged many reforms in educational policies and in hospital and prison conditions.

In 1804 Grellet married Rebecca Collins, the daughter of the publisher Isaac Collins. The family home, the Isaac Collins House, in Burlington, New Jersey, is now listed on the National Register of Historic Places.

*It is reputed that Grellet was the last living person who could have identified the "Lost Dauphin", the heir apparent of France.

(*) The fate of the “lost dauphin,” Louis XVII, has been a subject of mystery for over 200 years. Did he die in prison? Did he escape and become a famous American naturalist, or a German clockmaker, or an Episcopal minister raised by Native Americans? All of these solutions, and more, still have loyal supporters. The issue was laid to rest by DNA testing in 2000. But this is a mystery that just won’t die. There is no question that Louis XVI and his wife Marie Antoinette died under the guillotine during the French Revolution. It is the fate of their 10 year old son, Louis Charles, who disappeared in 1795, that is the mystery.

Grellet died in Burlington on 16 November 1855 and his body was buried there, behind the historic Quaker Meeting House in Burlington.

As I say, all very interesting...But I guess I'll never know where my dear grandmother picked up those fadding words that are now so firmly imprinted in my mind. Had to have been from something she read.

I never met my grandma Louise, she died five years before I was born. But I think she would be happy to know that something she wrote 125 years ago has left an impression on her only grandchild.

The circumstances of life truly do often cheat us out of wonderful and meaningful relationships afforded to the more fortunate.

Someone once said that you can't miss what you never had...To which I say "Oh ya?"

NEW YORK RANGERS PULLED A FAST ONE ON FANS IN 1926-27

Will the real Oliver Remikka and Lorne Chabot please take a step forward.

In his Strange But True column, veteran sports writer Stan Fischler has recounted some questionable duplicity that the New York Rangers used to multiply their fledgling fan base way back in their inaugural National Hockey League season.

When the legendary Marx Brothers comedy team was drawing laughs on Broadway in 1926, the New York Rangers were about to launch their first NHL season. And, strangely enough, there was a connection.

In their musical Cocoanuts, Chico Marx, while checking Florida real estate, turns to his brother Groucho and says, “Maybe it’s the house next door.” To which Groucho replies, “There is no house next door.” Chico: “That’s OK, boss, we’ll build one.”

When Johnny Bruno walked out of the theater showing Cocoanuts, the skit gave him an idea. Bruno happened to be press agent for the just-minted Rangers and he was worried about putting people in seats. The Blueshirts debut was coming exactly one year after the New York Americans had become Gotham’s first big-league hockey club. What’s more, the Amerks had already become a hit. Bruno needed something to grab attention away from the star-spangled rivals. But how?

He estimated the combined population of Jews and Italians in New York at more than a million. If the Rangers could tap into that potential fan base, their attendance worries would be over and maybe the Americans would be forgotten.

“We need a good Jewish player,” Bruno told one of his Madison Square Garden cronies, “and an Italian, too. Then we’ll pack the joint!”

There were two problems: the Rangers had neither a Jew nor an Italian on their roster, nor was there any expectation that they would. What would they do? Scratching his head, Bruno recalled Chico Marx’s deathless squelch: “That’s OK, boss, we’ll build one.” Except that Bruno would create an Italian and Jewish stickhandler for New York’s newest sextet out of thin air.

Scanning the lineup, Bruno zeroed in on forward Oliver Reinikka and goaltender Lorne Chabot, both Canadians, neither of whom was Jewish or Italian. His family roots in Finland, Reinikka grew up in Shuswap, B.C., and the very French-Canadian Chabot came from Montreal, a very Catholic city.

No sweat. Bruno had the names. He settled on “Ollie Rocco” for Reinikka. And then he transformed Chabot into “Chabotsky.” Poof! Just like that, you’re Jewish!

This seemed a doable jape to pull on unknowing New York fans that were just learning about the ice game, but what happened when the Blueshirts took to the road, especially Canada, where fans were well aware of Ollie as Reinikka and Lorne as Chabot?

“The way they worked it,” said Stan Saplin, who handled Rangers PR from 1946 through 1950, “was that ‘Chabotsky’ played only at home in Madison Square Garden. Chabot played only on the road. Ditto: ‘Ollie Rocco’ played only in the Garden, Oliver Reinikka only on the road. Bruno even gave Ollie a new hometown: Yonkers, New York.”

Nutty as the scheme was, the staid, conservative Rangers patriarch of the era, Lester Patrick, not only never put the kibosh on it, he actually saw the phony names in print, night after every game night at MSG. So, by the way, did Saplin a decade later.

When he moved into the Blueshirts publicist’s chair, Saplin began researching what was to be the NHL’s first team guide, The Blue Book, at the New York Public Library. It didn’t take long for him to do a double-take.

“I discovered that the first Rangers team had a goalie named Hal Winkler, another named Lorne Chabot and another named Lorne Chabotsky,” he said. “I was struck by a perplexing anomaly: Chabotsky and Chabot had the same first name.”

Nobody on the Canadian or American side of the border seemed to mind and through the 1926-27 season the Rocco-Chabotsky ploy rolled along unpenalized.

“And that is the way they were listed in Garden programs and referred to in New York newspapers,” Saplin said. “In Canadian rinks, where both were known, they had to remain Chabot and Reinikka. But eventually Chabotsky and Rocco were farmed out, never to be heard from again.”

Great story!

FLAG DAY IN CANADA

 Today, February 15th, is not only ‘Flag Day’, it is also the 54th anniversary of Canada’s flag. It was on February 15, 1965, after much controversy, that the red maple leaf was hoisted in Ottawa at the Peace Tower.

The Red Ensign

The debate over a new flag divided English speaking Canadian anglophones and Imperialists who wanted to keep the Red Ensign that had been Canada’s flag since before Confederation.

Among the most vocal supporters of the Red Ensign was the Royal Canadian Legion Veterans who had gone to war under the Ensign.

Prime Minister Lester B. Pearson, announced the year before, in 1964, that a new national flag would be brought in during his tenure and he had two preferred choices. Three maple leafs on a white background with a blue bar on either side and a single maple leaf with blue bars.

Lester Pearson's choice

As the debate waged on, almost 3,000 designs with traditional ‘Canadiana’ such as beavers, mountains, Mounties and hockey players were submitted to a flag committee, until December, 1964 when the debate was closed by the government.

Ultimate Choice: The Maple leaf designed by George F. Stanley and John Matheson was based on the flag of the Royal Military College of Canada.

The Canadian Red Ensign is still part of the Royal Canadian Legion colour party and has also officially been declared to fly with the Canadian Maple Leaf at the Canadian National Vimy war memorial in France.

The Red Maple Leaf flag flies on my house year-round.

FEELING DOWN IN THE DUMPS LATELY? FACEBOOK COULD BE THE CULPRIT

• Negative
• Offensive
• Insensitive
• Sensitive
• Insulting
• Bullying
• Agenda
• Victimization
• ...all the above and more in one five-minute scroll through any hour's worth of public posts on Facebook. Discounting, of course, a smattering of news-of-the day items, words of inspiration and pleasant images from anonymous sources shared by well-intended friends.

I swear, I often feel like I've been dragged through an emotional knot hole of depression after succumbing to the impulse to scan through the latest Facebook posts in any given hour of any given day. Mind you, some people thrive on controversy, belittlement and rabble rousing.  There is something self-satisfying in their psyche that makes them feel that if it is demonstrative enough it will somehow be more readily accepted and impactful at some impressionable level of scrutiny.

No hiding the fact that all of this has become an irritation for me. The repeated sharing of false news on personal timelines is an issue in particular that upsets me no end. In fact schools are now conducting classes for students aimed at helping them to detect false news when they are doing online research.

Well, if you are also wondering why you may feel down in the dumps after you browse Facebook, a new study has evidence that the social network might be to blame. Based on personal experience, I certainly buy into those findings.

The report, with a long title "Association of Facebook Use with Compromised Well-Being: A Longitudinal Study," was published in a recent issue of the American Journal of Epidemiology and subsequently written about by Harvard Business Review. It argues that using Facebook regularly can have a negative effect on a person's well-being. Conversely, participating in "real world" social networks can have a positive effect on health.

"Exposure to the carefully curated images from others' lives leads to negative self-comparison, and the sheer quantity of social media interaction may detract from more meaningful real-life experiences," the report says. In other words, this study seems to show exactly why you might feel really great after hanging out with friends in person, but pretty down on yourself after spending time surfing Facebook alone.

"These results were particularly strong for mental health; most measures of Facebook use in one year predicted a decrease in mental health in a later year," said researchers Holly Shakya with the University of California, San Diego, and Nicholas Christakis with the Human Nature Lab at Yale University. "We found consistently that both liking others' content and clicking links significantly predicted a subsequent reduction in self-reported physical health, mental health, and life satisfaction."

The evidence even applied to people who were already using Facebook. If a test subject used the social network even more, the researchers found there was still an association "with a likelihood of diminished future well-being," showing that "compromised well-being is a dynamic process."

The report didn't dig into other social networks like Snapchat or Instagram and how they might affect our well being, too, but they probably do, especially if the interactions aren't truly as meaningful as they might seem.

"While screen time in general can be problematic, the tricky thing about social media is that while we are using it, we get the impression that we are engaging in meaningful social interaction," the researchers said. "Our results suggest that the nature and quality of this sort of connection is no substitute for the real world interaction we need for a healthy life."

Message to self: "Give less credence to what you see on Facebook and spend more time engaging in real life personal connections and interactions."

Meantime, God bless the dear souls who keep their timelines pleasant and positively informative places for friends and family to visit.

CANNABIS SPAWNS A NEW CANADIAN INDUSTRY IN MY BACK YARD ...(LITERALLY SPEAKING)

While I do not partake and do not intend to any time soon, the world is changing its view on cannabis, and a rapidly-growing operation in nearby Tiverton is lighting the way. Supreme Cannabis Company sits at the centre of this shift, with a mission to grow sustainable cannabis businesses. I find the development of this new industry not only interesting but indicative of changing times in the 21st Century.

The Supreme Cannabis Company  has announced that its wholly owned subsidiary, 7ACRES, has entered into a supply agreement with the New Brunswick Liquor Corporation to supply recreational cannabis to its retail stores and has been registered as a supplier in the province of Saskatchewan. The two provinces become 7ACRES’ seventh and eighth provincial partners alongside British Columbia, Alberta, Manitoba, Ontario, Nova Scotia and PEI.

“We’re excited to announce that 7ACRES-branded products will be available for adult-use in eight Canadian provinces coast-to-coast,” said Navdeep Dhaliwal, CEO of Supreme Cannabis. “In a short amount of time, 7ACRES has won multiple awards and received overwhelmingly enthusiastic consumer feedback. Our company has made it a priority to expand 7ACRES’ domestic distribution so that more Canadians will be able to experience our High-End CannabisTM products.”

In addition, the company recently received approval from the Depository Trust Company (DTC) of New York to make the Company’s shares DTC eligible.

DTC is a subsidiary of the Depository Trust & Clearing Corporation, a U.S. company that manages the electronic clearing and settlement of publicly traded companies. Securities that are eligible to be electronically cleared and settled through DTC are considered to be “DTC eligible”. This electronic method of clearing securities speeds up the receipt of stock and cash, and thus accelerates the settlement process for certain investors.

“DTC eligibility greatly simplifies the process of trading our common stock in the United States, further improving our investment appeal south of the border,” said Dhaliwal.

The Supreme Cannabis Company is a Canadian publicly traded company that includes its wholly-owned subsidiary 7ACRES, operating from a 440,000-square-foot facility in the Municipality of Kincardine, adjacent to the Bruce Power complex on the shores of Lake Huron.

7ACRES’ brand success has been reflected in its multiple award wins, including the “Brand of the Year” award at the 2018 Canadian Cannabis Awards, and in provincial supply agreements where 7ACRES’ product is consistently listed in the highest brand category available to recreational and medicinal consumers.

The Company’s growing portfolio also includes an equity investment and long-term global distribution partnership with Lesotho-based Medigrow for the exporting of medical-grade cannabis oil that is proving to be beneficial for individuals suffering from a variety of afflictions.

It all boggles the mind of a child of the 1940's who never so much as smoked tobacco.

OUR PRIME MINISTER IS UNDESERVING OF INSULTS AND TRASH TALK

Justin Pierre James Trudeau, (born December 25, 1971 in Ottawa), is the 23rd and current Prime Minister of Canada. and the leader of the Liberal Party of Canada. He was elected leader on April 14, 2013 and was designated the next Prime Minister in the federal election of October 19, 2015, after leading his party to a majority government victory.

He is the eldest son of former Prime Minister Pierre Trudeau and is the second child in Canadian history to be born while one of his parents was prime minister; the first was John A. Macdonald's youngest daughter Margaret Mary Macdonald. Trudeau earned a Bachelor of Arts degree in literature from McGill University and a Bachelor of Education degree from the University of British Columbia. After graduation, he worked as a social studies and French teacher at West Point Grey Academy and Sir Winston Churchill Secondary School in Vancouver.

Decent, if not impressive credentials for any 48-year-old married father of two, don't you agree? 

-- Based on the above thumbnail sketch there's every reason to be proud?...Most certainly!

-- Excellent potential to succeed in any walk of life. Why not?

-- A little too young and naive to be thrust into the meat grinder of national politics...Yes! Lacking in exposure to life in the real world? Again, yes!

-- Ill-advised in some actions, both policy-making and on the world stage? Can't help but agree!

-- Difficulty getting his words out when pressured by probing media questions? Embarrassingly, yes?

Still, young Justine Trudeau is our duly elected head of state.  He gives every indication of having Canadian interests at heart and he is applying himself to the best of his ability to the responsibilities of the PM's office and all that goes with it. Regardless of how we vote, he is deserving of respect and a degree of latitude. He is showing signs of maturity, but perhaps not soon enough, nor fast enough for some people. While a natural target for all and sundry, in his defense he does not act alone. He has a cabinet and a government behind him. It is not the "Trudeau government", it is the "Liberal government" or, to be honest, "the government."

Mind you, there is a very good reason for how I have worded the introduction to this post. And I am being very careful to ensure that I stay as neutral and bias-free as possible in what follows, as distasteful as it is sure to be. While I am placing emphasis on Trudeau, the thesis is applicable to politicians of all stripes.

Political hostility in Canada is more and more becoming personal hostility. New findings suggest that the sources of dispute in contemporary life go far beyond ideological differences or mere polarization. They have become elemental, almost tribal, tapping into in-group loyalty and out-group enmity and by degrees it is killing unity in our country.

And you know what? There have been 13 Canadian prime ministers during my lifetime -- William Lyon Mackenzie King through to Stephen Harper -- and none of them were subjected to the amount of disrespect, insults and indignities being directed at Justine Trudeau in his short time in office. Admittedly, toward the end of his tenure Stephen Harper may have come a close second.

Quite honestly, I can't believe some of the trash talk and abuse coming out of Canadian mouths. As Prime Minister, Trudeau (as Harper before him) is simply undeserving of such hurtful treatment and indecency.

While common fodder for coffee shop conversations -- you overhear it every day -- online social media has become the prime cesspool of insults, generally from cowards who really have no argument but are able to vent venom anonymously. Still others have become so emboldened as to not conceal their identities when voicing crude opinions and hurling insults on personal timelines. Really, when you stop to think about it, who wants to read that kind of constant bitching and complaining anyway.

I view it as personal assassination and it is uncalled for and unfair in a nation that otherwise prides itself in being humane and nice.

To illustrate my point, I took it upon myself to extract words of hate and insult levelled at Trudeau from just one online thread the other day. Here goes:

• liar
• cheat
• failure
• dumb
• idiot
• menace
• clown
• sick
• nut job
• incompetent
• mental twinky
• buffoon
• trash
• treasonous
• bed wetter
• crayon eater
• ghoulish moron
• wicked (illumati puppet)
• lunatic...

The list could go on but I'll cut it off there because I'm becoming nauseous just writing it. You too? 

Why is viscous name calling so prevalent in political discourses today? So un-Canadian -- or at least it used to be. Somehow this inhumane trend has to stop. Trudeau may be shielded from a lot of it but an impressionable public gets it adnauseam.

It’s time for us to choose between a course of further fracturing our shared humanity or imagine friendships rooted in difference, respect and oneness. “A—-hole” politics, language and labels diminishes all. Lowering the temperature and improving our argument may be good for all of us because who we are defined as a people is at stake.

By all means let healthy debate continue, freely expressing ourselves and offering viable solutions when possible. Be critical when criticism is justified. But please, leave harmful insults, name calling and personal attacks out of it. Sarcasm reflects poorly and gains nothing. 

If you cannot make a point without demeaning someone's character, then you really do not have a point at all and you are wasting everyone's time.

Think twice before speaking or venting your thoughts in writing, is a good axiom. We don't always have to be seen as clever, politically astute tough guys in order to make an impression.

SOUTHAMPTON GRANDDAD THRILLED TO JOIN ST. LOUIS BLUES DAD'S TRIP

St. Louis Blues' Robert Thomas and grandpop Bruce Waechter enroute to a team practise.

Bruce Waechter of Southampton had the thrill of a lifetime when his grandson, NHL St. Louis Blues rookie, Robert Thomas, asked his grandpa to accompany him on the team’s current annual ‘Dad’s Trip’.

The dads, plus one very happy grandfather, watched Tuesday's game between the Blues and Florida Panthers from a suite at BB&T Center, then flew on the team's charter to Tampa Bay on Wednesday. Thursday (tonight), they will cheer on the Blues from the stands at Amalie Arena as they battle the Lightning. And before each game, they are being treated to a pregame dinner with Hockey Hall of Famer Al MacInnis.Pumping his fist enthusiastically, Bruce explained "That's what I did when Robert (Thomas) called and asked me if I wanted to come on the Dad's Trip. "I'm a calm and laid back type of person all the time, OK? I'm not the rambunctious type. But the insides of me just got so excited."

"When I found out about the trip, I obviously wanted my dad to come, but he was away on business, so it was a great opportunity to invite my grandpa," Thomas said. "He's always been there supporting me through hockey and for every tournament, he's been there for me. It was pretty cool to be able to invite him for this. From the moment I told him, I could tell how excited he was."

Waechter took the first flight out of Toronto on Monday morning and was in Fort Lauderdale by 9:15 a.m. Soon after dropping his suitcase off in Thomas' room, he boarded the team bus, sat in the team's pre-scouting meeting and watched the Blues practice.

"I'll remember this as long as I live," Waechter said. "There are about 16 of us that golf in the summer time back home, but in the winter time, we go to the local pub in Southampton for lunch every Monday. Only about half of those guys know I'm down here in Florida. I can hardly wait to get back to tell them about this."

THE GROWING EMPHASIS ON THE NEED FOR CHURCH GROWTH TODAY

At the outset I know full well that what follows here will be given a short shift by the majority of Wrights Lane readers because "church-related" items simply do not turn the average person's crank any more than actual church attendance itself in this day and age. Nevertheless, I pursue this subject because it exemplifies a fairly-recent and interesting (to me at least) entrepreneurial movement aimed at churches struggling to stay alive in a rapidly growing ecumenical environment. 

The above post(er) was shared on a friend's Facebook church group page and it immediately triggered mixed emotions within me. 

My first impulse was that this simplified snippet and statement lacked necessary elaboration, i.e. "Says Who...?" Followed by what I thought was misuse of the word "passion" which has troubling connotations. Furthermore, I worry that churches that become glorified social service agencies lose their call to grow in spiritual maturity...and at the expense of those faithful "few" who have kept the physical church alive to this point.

While offering food for thought, I contend that a passion for people in and of itself, is very dangerous. But on the other hand, when you understand the nature of the gospel, the shape of the early church, the mood and tone of the apostles themselves, and the vision of God for his world, it isn’t possible to live without a passion to actually see churches grow.

Of course, my reality today can be complicated when twinned with the old-school Christian traditionalist who feels all-too-comfortable in the insular church introduced to me as a child of the 1940's...A warm almost awe-inspiring sanctuary to be regularly visited on Sabbath mornings dressed in your go-to- meetin' best. I confess to still deriving comfort from sitting in a hard, sometimes cold pew; the reading of scripture, familiar hymns and memories complete with ghosts from generations past.

Sadly, youth of today know nothing of any of that. And who is to blame?

I was particularly conscious of all this after attending a worship service this past Sunday that drew 18 congregants, seven of which were members of the choir. Of that number 85 percent were over 65 years of age. This on top of news that three struggling small community congregations in the nearby area were coincidentally holding closing services that very week.

To advocate the closing of a church, regardless of circumstances, is surely to disappoint God. I think it is that sentiment that worries most people.

It is sad to be privy to the demise of anything or anyone. Having grieved the passing of all-too-many immediate loved ones, I know the signs of immanent death when exposed to them. I also understand the impulse to hang on for dear life, until the will to live inevitably gives out. In time, we all reach a point of no return. Such is the case with aging churches today. God bless those tired souls who cling to the traditional church because, well -- they know no other way.

Carey Nieuwhof, Barrie

All of which takes me back to the "churches that become passionate about people outside their walls," pronouncement. My curiosity was drawn to the fine-print "Carey Nieuwhof" credit line accompanying the wording in the subject post. Carey Nieuwhof, I discover, is the founding pastor of Connexus Community Church, a growing and on the surface thriving multi-campus church located in Barrie, Orillia and Midland. Surprisingly close to home as it turns out.

Nieuwhof is author of several bestselling books, blogs, podcasts, and speaks to church leaders around the world about leadership, change, and personal growth. He is a graduate of Osgoode Hall Law School and also holds degrees in history and theology. He was called to the Bar of Ontario in 1993 and then left law to pursue ministry. He, wife Toni and two sons live near Barrie.

Typical of how things find their way into the realm of social media, this particular attribution to Nieuwhof was circulated by the Community Clergy Coaching Network in the U.S. with the cautionary note: "If you are uncomfortable with posts coming from a variety of points of view (conservative, moderate and liberal), this may not be the page for you."

It seems that posts carried by CCCN come from a variety of theological perspectives and seek to address the challenges and opportunities facing communities, clergy, congregations and lay leaders in the 21st. century. Similar innovative endeavors have sprung up this past decade and are actually charging a fee to deliver progressive ideas to struggling churches. It really is a whole new world and approach to marketing evangelism.

This is what I uncovered Carey Nieuwhof saying on the future of churches: "Almost every leader I talk to acknowledges that our culture is shifting. To reach a changing culture, the church needs to change. Rapidly.

"Don’t get me wrong, we don’t need to change the message. Just the method. One is sacred. The other is not" he hastens to add.

"What isn’t as clear is what the future church will look like, and what kind of characteristics will mark those churches. However, I think a few trends are becoming clear...Wise leaders are taking steps today to position their churches to respond to these things. I know that’s what I’m trying to do at Connexus, where I have the privilege of serving."

Here's how he expands on the aforementioned 'Churches that become passionate about people outside their walls will be far more effective than churches that are passionate about keeping the few people they have inside their walls': "Better still," he adds, "You will have a healthier church. We call individuals who are fixated on their wants and needs selfish and immature. Selfless and mature churches will have an impact because of their passion for people God cares about."

There, he got it right that time..."Passion for people God cares about," presumably the needy, the unchurched and youth looking for meaning in life.

"Churches in decline often think in terms of what they can get from people – money, time, growth etc. Churches that will make an impact on the future will be passionate about what they want for people – financial balance, generosity, the joy of serving, better families, and of course, Christ at the center of everyone’s life."

He has little "passion" for older church members who are inflexible to change and consequently detrimental to growth.

On the subject of online communications he further suggests that churches that aren't beyond a website are going to miss the boat. "Real interaction with real people online is…well…real. Sure, face to face is deeper, but people will tell you things online they can’t muster the courage to tell you face to face. Whether you get them to a ‘real’ church is increasingly debatable. I would love that. But we’ll have to see. As much as you might hate it, virtual relationships are becoming real relationships."

So there you have it. Carey Nieuwhof is only one person but he is indicative of a new era in aggressive, outward-bound churching that is unfolding.  Some of us, meantime, would do well to heed to the words of Apostle Paul in speaking to the Galatians: “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” 

All of which may come too little, too late for long-in-the-tooth congregations too frail and insufficient in numbers to correct past errors and to make the necessary transition into the future.

When the little church of a couple of dozen individuals (on a good Sunday) that I adhere to decides to close its doors for one last time, that will be when I choose to no longer attend church. If nothing else, it will be a good excuse to sleep in on Sunday mornings.

What does that tell you about me as the twilight hovers?

While life goes on and ultimately changes, it ends for those of us who eventually fall out of step -- it's as simple as that. 

Suffice for we oldtime churchgoers to come away with the satisfaction that in our antiquity we did our best in serving fellow man at home and abroad -- and giving humbly what we could to the glory of God. We did, didn't we?