Sharing with you things that are on my mind...Maybe yours too. Come back to Wrights Lane for a visit anytime!

02 January, 2013


It is easy to get trapped doing the same thing every day, but trying something new is proven to boost happiness and confidence. There is no faster route to self-confidence than by stepping out of your comfort zone. “It sends a message of self-belief to your subconscious that you believe in yourself,” says life coach Domonique Bertolucci, author of The Happiness Code. “Your confidence levels will automatically rise.”

I have written on this subject frequently in the past and I touch on it again in this post because I know that there are at least a couple of  young people out there who can benefit at a crucial stage in their lives.  Stepping out of your comfort zone makes perfect sense, so why don’t we automatically do it? “Fear – we expect to stuff up and fail,” says psychologist and coach Dr Darryl Cross, another authority.
Follow these easy tips and you’ll learn to consistently keep out of your comfort zone as you progress though life.  I know from first-hand experience, because I have followed every one of them over the years as I overcame an inborn shyness and fear of failure.  Oh sure, I have had failures...There is no guarantee otherwise.  Things do not always work out as we would have liked, but we learn best from failure.  We improve as individuals every time we face a challenge head on.  
Plan ahead

Everyone has a different comfort zone, so you need to clarify what needs changing in your life. Know what the big picture looks like and make it enticing.  Whether you want to make a career move, drop a clothing size, save money or develop better relationships, you need to make a plan in order to get there. Make a list of 12 things you can do over the next 12 months that feel scary now, but that you know will give your confidence a big boost when you do them. As Bertolucci puts it in her new book: “If you aim to do one thing each month that scares you, at the end of the year your confidence levels will have soared.”

Act confident

Practice holding your head high and you’ll feel more positive. Imagine a time when you were feeling successful – now practice standing that way, sitting that way and moving that way. When you change your body to be confident, your body starts controlling your brain, rather than the brain controlling body.  Suddenly, stepping out of your comfort zone will not seem so hard.  The more you do it, the easier it gets.

Boost your body confidence 
Negative body talk can trap you in your comfort zone, so rather than putting yourself down, try repeating positive statements to change your head space. “Write a simple statement about how you would like your world to be,” Bertolucci says. “Make sure you write it in the present tense and repeat your affirmations three times over, three times a day and watch your self-belief grow.”

Don't give up
I repeat, accept the fact that you will make mistakes. “We learn more from our failures than our successes,” Dr Cross emphasizes. “But as you refine the technique and get it right you feel proud, which enhances self esteem.”

Shyness and lack of confidence can be successfully countered, trust me.  But it takes work, commitment and ultimate action.  You have to be motivated to take that first "uncomfortable" step into a place that you have never been before.  But that's life, isn't it?

We face something new and different every minute, every hour, every day.  That's what is so wonderful about life!  Embrace those new and different things with joy and excitement.  Do not become so comfortable within yourself that you shy away from the potentially great things that life has in store for you.

Comfort breeds complacency, laziness, stagnation.  Hermits are complacent, lazy and stagnant...In time they waste away -- all by themselves.  Don't become a hermit.  The world needs you!

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