Sharing with you things that are on my mind...Maybe yours too. Come back to Wrights Lane for a visit anytime! And, by all means, let's hear from you by leaving a comment at the end of any post. THE MOTIVATION: I firmly believe that if I have felt, experienced or questioned something in life, then surely others must have too. That's what this blog is all about -- hopefully relating in some meaningful way -- sharing, if you will, on subjects of an inspirational and human interest nature. Nostalgia will frequently find its way into some of the items...And lots of food for thought. A work in progress, to be sure.

31 January, 2020

TILLSONBURG BAT MAKER HEADED TO THE MAJORS

Trevor Oakes trying out his new baseball bat lathe.
TILLSONBURG, ONT. -- When Trevor Oakes quit his factory job at Toyota to focus on making baseball bats full time, he had a five-year plan to make it to ‘the show.’ He expedited that process, accomplishing his dream in three years.

Trevor's company, ABO Baseball was recently approved as an Major League Baseball bat supplier. "We received a letter via email last Tuesday from MLB commissioner Rob Manfred's office and it congratulated us on making the cut," Oakes explained.

After speaking with CTV News Tuesday, he was jumping in his truck and heading to Madison, Wis. He needed to be there Wednesday for mandatory MLB wood training.

Already selling his bats worldwide, he thinks getting approval for big league players to use his bats in games is a difference maker. "It will scale us to be a top bat maker in Canada and in North America," adds Oakes. "This will help gain exposure, and then people will know who we are."

He gained local notoriety last year, when Intercounty London Majors' slugger Cleveland Brownlee had a few custom bats made for charity. One of them was a bat painted like Spiderman which was sold and the proceeds donated to the Children's Health Foundation.

This week, a brand new lathe arrived at his shop. It will help him produce his maple and birch bats in six to eight minutes, and the robot will be able to mass produce, replicating a large number of bats

"Instead of making 10-20 bats in a day, we can do that 10-20 in a couple hours. Our goal is to punch out 50-100 in a day."

Oakes started ABO Baseball in a shop at his house and he named the company after the initials of his kids.

He's since opened a facility in Tillsonburg housing his shop, batting cages, and an indoor MLB simulator. He says he's the only one west of Kitchener who offers this program.

In just three weeks, he'll pack his bats and head to Florida and Arizona for Major League spring training camps. He'll set up tables at the stadiums and give the players a chance to feel and swing his products, maybe even give them a test in batting cages.


He's dreaming big with the ultimate goal of making his Tillsonburg workshop a tourist destination. "The goal is to be a mini-factory and a bat producer which will put our name on the map."

"People can come hit and see the MLB bats that are made right here in this little factory."


There's more than one way for a Canadian to make the Major Leagues and there's every reason for all Canucks to be proud of Keven Oakes' 
entrepreneurial achievment.

Birch wood waits to be carved into baseball bats at ABO Baseball in Tillsonburg, ON.


30 January, 2020

CHURCH TEACHING HAS FAILED TODAY'S YOUTH

The Sunday School of my memory.
When some of us think of Sunday school, we envision a group of children in child-size chairs listening to an adult read a Bible story. Behind them is a bulletin board filled with maps of the Holy Land and the children’s art work, with a chart on the wall boasting lines of gold stars for each child’s attendance. Everyone colors in a workbook and can’t wait to take home the handout that the teacher distributes. The reality is much more varied and uncertain. Regretful even.

Not long ago, I delivered a sermon on an increased need to impress our young people with the merits of living a life based on Christian principles, going so far as to call on grandparents and other close relatives to pick up the slack. I fear the dissertation was noted more for its length than for the rather protracted message.

Nevertheless, I have been struck with the realization that in churches (and too few Christian homes) across the world, we have been teaching kids about their faith" backwards", as one observer has expressed it. Quite frankly, it is a common mistake.

Through Bible parables, songs, and verses a great deal of time has been spent teaching children about Jesus, the prophets, and the disciples. But sadly, the essentials of the Christian faith often get neglected, or take a back seat to an emphasis on the recitation of stories coupled with fun and games.

Kids can attend Sunday school for years and still come up with questions like, “How do I pray?” and “Why should I pray when God already knows everything?" "How do I know that everything in the Bible is true?”

As church attendance declines, we see a parallel decrease in children’s participation in Sunday schools and educational programming. The heartbreaking result: The majority of Christian children today walk away from church involvement before they leave high school. They see no relevancy and become bored with the repetition of it all.

In reality and at the end of the day, children should be learning to understand the living God and the fundamentals of how to relate to Him...1) how to talk to God in prayer, 2) how to hear God's messages, 3) how to develop a relationship with Christ, and 4) how to live as a Christian in an increasingly secular world.

It is all about building a foundation on which faith can grow through life. And you know what? In my experience it has been surprising how agreeable kids always are to listening to meaningful messages relating to God in their lives.

To their credit, several faith organizations have actually recognized teaching shortcomings and are developing lessons for children that address the long-standing deficiency. Hopefully such measures will fill the cracks, albeit too little too late for many of our millennials who will be the leaders of tomorrow.

Kids do not always need to be entertained any more than they need to be "talked to". They do, however, react to learning challenges, inspiration and encouragement. Trouble is, we have arrived at a point where there is an associated declining number of committed adults serving as youth leaders, teaching and setting Christian examples for our kids, especially in smaller communities. It has become a Catch 22.

In fact, a growing number of churches have no programming for children. Some carefully integrate the children’s interests and needs into the Sunday worship service itself. Other aging churches have few or no young families present in their congregation and hence, a degree of vitality has been lost.

And while the reasons for this are nuanced and complex, there is no doubt that part of the blame falls on the church’s, perhaps innocent inability to highlight the beauty and truth of Christ’s call to discipleship in ways that resonate with young people.

Sorry, but I do not have faith in a reversal of this trend any time soon. I have exhausted alternatives in my time and have only to wait it out, praying for a shift in spiritual attitudes and the prevailing of God's will on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Granted, this is a sad commentary on the state of the world we live in today.

Church has become uncool for the younger generation! Maybe there is a better way and it will surface with the next generation. Some of us will never know.

I hesitate to get any more long-winded on this subject...I've been there and done that!

One has to be cognizant of attention spans --- and other priorities in life, especially when on a soap box or standing behind a pulpit on a Sunday morning.

28 January, 2020

ATTENTION SUMMER VISITORS: SAND DUNES ARE VITAL TO LAKE HURON WATER LEVELS

When I lived on Miramichi Bay 20 years ago there was a 60-foot beech at this exact spot. ~~ Photos by Sandy Lindsay, Saugeen Times
Mother Nature knows what she is doing, short-sighted humans who occupy her earthly space -- not so much!

I came to that conclusion after reading a report from the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers, which monitors Great Lakes water levels. Lake Huron will apparently reach an all-time high this June. Lakes Michigan and Huron will start 2020 at slightly over 25cm (11 inches) higher than water levels the same time last year (January/19).

“The latest forecast extends into March, and for the most part, levels are going to be on-par with or above where they were at the same time last year,” said Keith Kompoltowicz, chief of watershed hydrology at the U.S. Army Corps of Engineers in Detroit. “Lakes Michigan and Huron are an inch or less off their 100-year highs.”

Officials predict Lake Huron will read 177.58 centimetres in June, surpassing the previous record of 177.5 cm in October of 1986. More than 1,000 structures sit in an erosion danger zone along the shores of Lake Huron. Of those, 700 are in Huron and Bruce counties and out of interest I view the rising level of the water every day that I visit the post office in Southampton, a few hundred yards from the shrinking shoreline beach in Southampton.

While communities, including Goderich are attempting to stop rising water levels from decimating its beaches by shoring up with armour stone, the Lake Huron Coastal Conservation Centre (LHCCC), says that one of the best remedies is to allow beaches to create dunes through plantings. Summer visitors to the area, of course, do not understand such conservation initiatives and wrongly think that the municipalty is letting beaches "go to pot".

According to the Action Plan, “As coastal communities grow and change, focus is needed on maintaining ecosystem function, wildlife populations, adapting to climate change and maintaining water quality. This will require environmental restoration, protection, and enhancement to ensure the vitality of these ecosystems, and the surrounding communities. Significant regional threats to Lake Huron’s biodiversity and water quality, including pollution, shoreline development and alteration, invasive species, and climate change create risks to the health of coastal ecosystems … From removing hardened shoreline structures on private property, to embarking on reforestation projects; collaboration, communication, and proactive planning are the tools that will allow us to become resilient and sustainable, together.”

Frank Burrows: The necessity of sand dunes.
Frank Burrows, Saugeen Shores Manager of Parks, recently explained the process of beach ecology.

“Our waterfront is divided into zones and not all zones are handled the same,” said Burrows. “Each is dependent on usage and the integrity of the area. When it comes to dunes, removing them will destroy a beach as the waterfront is ecologically complicated and fragile. While some people like beaches left natural and that provide habitat for wildlife, others want the beach groomed. It’s a real balancing act.”

He pointed out that Port Elgin Beach in particular suffered because of its lack of dunes and, as a result, is a very wet beach. Planting the right grasses help to retain the sand the would be lost through wind erosion. “With our recent rising water levels, we have to be especially cognizant of protecting our beaches by helping them to create dunes.”

It will be interesting to see how this reality settles with proponents of a multi-million dollar development designed to attract visitors to the main beach at Port Elgin -- buildings, pavement vs. sand dunes and Indian grass.

Burrows said that during low water levels, vegetation begins to grow and, if removed with heavy equipment, it destroys the beach as the root systems are eliminated and they are what holds the sand. “Unfortunately, some people take matters into their own hands but the public lands should be respected. Sand has a cycle that provides sustainability. Wind creates sand migration and, again, dunes with grasses help prevent that. However, high water levels actually drag the sand out creating sand bars. Most beaches were created during the ice age so, once sand is lost, it never comes back.”

He also explained that each beach is different. “Southampton with its dunes is very different than the wet Port Elgin beach that has been heavily groomed. “Along the multi-use shoreline trail, we have had to shore it up with stone but even that doesn’t stop the erosion,” said Burrows. “In Southampton, Captain Spence Trail has been almost entirely lost.” (see photo below)

He added that a lot of run-off in the spring can result in trees and logs, particularly north of the Saugeen River, being washed up on shore. “While some people don’t like it, it is actually a measure of protection against erosion and also provides habitat for wildlife. 

 Also, along the beaches, often there will be what appears as black sludge. All it is, in reality, is vegetation that washes up on shore and it is filled with nutrients. "We try to keep on top of it with manually raking but it is a part of nature," Burrow added.

It goes without saying that we have to be careful in messing with Mother Nature. In thousands of years of civilization, the conflict between humankind and Nature has never been as serious as it is today. The depletion, deterioration and exhaustion of resources and the worsening ecological environment in general have become bottlenecks and grave impediments to our economic and social development.

25 January, 2020

THE "ODD"YSSEY OF FUTURE LIVING

"A Space Odyssey" is an epic 1968 science fiction film which follows a voyage to Jupiter with the sentient computer HAL after the discovery of a featureless alien monolith affecting human evolution. It dealt with mind-boggling themes like existentialism, human evolution, technology, artificial inteligence and the possibility of extraterrestrial life. The production is noted for its scientifically accurate depiction of space flight, pioneering special effects, and ambiguous imagery receiving diverse critical responses ranging from those who saw it as darkly apocalyptic in tone to those who saw it as an optimistic reappraisal of the hopes of humanity. The film garnered a cult following and became the highest-grossing North American film of 1968. It was nominated for four Academy Awards.

A Space Odyssey seemed like a far-off and mind-blowingly, amazing depiction of the future. In some ways, like flying cars, we’re still a ways off but a whole range of other innovations, such as smart home technology, eco-friendly dwellings and video calling, indicate that we are actually right in the middle of it.

Here, according to a recent exhibit at the Design Museum in London, are a few future living trends that will be part of our lives in 2020 and beyond:

Living with others: With the cost of real estate and renting so high in big cities like London, Tokyo, New York and Toronto, many are opting to pool their resources and buy or rent larger homes than they might otherwise be able to do alone. Some banks are even customizing mortgages to adapt to this new reality. Others are opting for co-living, smaller apartments similar to student residences, where renters share common spaces like gyms, work lounges with free Wi-Fi, utilities and housekeeping.

Living with less: While co-living also falls under the category, this also includes trends like down-sizing your home and living with less clutter as well as reusing and sharing items. For instance, Turo is a car-sharing company that allows private car owners to rent their vehicles to others when they’re not using them and make money in the process.

Living smart: Many of us are already familiar with smart home technology like smart thermostats that save energy and money and smart doorbells allow you to monitor who’s at your door 24/7. Megaretailers like Amazon and Walmart are also experimenting with services like auto-delivery where groceries are delivered right to your fridge and freezer or technology that sends out alerts to restock your milk or ice cream when it’s running low.

Some “digital nomads” are even ditching a permanent home altogether and opting to travel full-time, working from wherever they are. Others are retiring on cruise ships, which researchers have determined to cost less than living in an assisted living facility. 

All very interesting, but...I dunno!

For now, I think that I will settle for living the best in-the-moment life within my means and let nature take its course with my hands on the wheel. That way you never know where you’ll end up – and that’s the best part of the future.

22 January, 2020

DARE TO THINK: THE ART OF CULTIVATING INNER JUDGEMENT

It is a complex and wonderful world that we all live in, deserving serious understanding and rationalization at some period of our lives. In that respect, and after deep soul-searching and considerable honest self-analysis, I have arrived at the aforesaid.

Not a day goes by that I am not enlightened in some way shape or form, particularly in recent weeks in my struggle with a major health issue and the ramifications.  Results: I am left with an overriding sense of awe and respect, complicated by humility and the reality of how little I know about a lot of things.

Consider, for instance, a few of the amasing individuals who have/are currently facilitating me in my small, insignificant and somewhat needy world.

-- Countless health care professionals (doctors, nurses, specialists) in whom I place my well-being and faith. I follow their direction and counsel because I accept the fact that they are fully educated and trained in their field and know better than me what is ultimately in my best interests. I bow and I follow.

-- I have gained special appreciation too for several good souls from the Canadian Cancer Society's Wheels of Hope volunteer program who I rely on to drive me to hospital appointments. One is a former Warden of Grey County and Mayor of the Township of Georgian Bluffs who has dedicated himself to helping others in his retirement. Imagine, a well-respected local politician driving me to appointments out of the goodness of his heart and you wonder about my humility?

-- Another Wheels of Hope volunteer driver is a retired nuclear engineer, of all things. Ashley's background is truly impressive and he talks generally in terms that go completely over my head. Our worlds came together not through his knowledge of nuclear energy, but through his benevolence.

-- In recent months, as a sidelined lay preacher, I have worked closely with a church co-op moderator who just happens to have a Doctor of Ministry degree from the University of Dubuque Theological Seminary in the area of Congregational Redevelopment and Trinitarian Theology. He also has a Master of Theology from Union Presbyterian Seminary in New Testament and Pauline Studies; Master of Divinity from Union Presbyterian Seminary; Bachelor of Science from Eastern Mennonite University in Biblical Studies and Theology, Christian Ministries, and Religion and Philosophy. Compare all that to a pitiful certificate in lay ministry that gave me a license to facilitate pulpit-fill requirements in churches with pastoral vacancies. Rev. Randy continues to be a source of support and spiritual inspiration.

What I am getting at here is that the core ethos of life has always been humane and it has taken my health setback to underline that for me. When asked what Enlightenment meant to him, one of the great philosophers of all time, Immanuel Kant, said the following:

“Enlightenment is man’s emergence from his self-imposed nonage. Nonage is the inability to use one’s own understanding without another’s guidance. This nonage is self-imposed if its cause lies not in lack of understanding but in indecision and lack of courage to use one’s own mind without another’s guidance. Dare to know! (Sapere aude.) “Have the courage to use your own understanding,” is therefore the motto of the enlightenment.”


More than anything, the Enlightenment was an exercise in unconstrained collective thinking, with a process in place to give the best ideas their shot at meritocratic victories.

Today, we almost take for granted this whole way of existing. We are born into it, and we trust it by default. We forget that it wasn’t always like this. We broadly understand that science is useful and important and can tell us a lot about how the world works. We also value reason. We know that evidence is better than no evidence, and logic beats most kinds of inconsistencies.

There is, however, an important way in which most of us don’t always apply Kant’s call to action. When it comes to our sense of self, on the personal and the individual level, it seems that we would rather bind ourselves to this nonage that he speaks of rather than working up the courage to know. Perhaps what I’m getting at is just a deeply ingrained aspect of human nature, and we are all bound to it no matter what we do, but perhaps, then, his reminder to know for ourselves is more important than ever.

Much of our learning is done through cultural transmission. Every person we interact with gives a piece of themselves to us. Our families instill values in us. Our teachers and our mentors dish out platitudes. Our society, at large, tells us what is okay to believe and what is not. And for the most part, we don’t even think twice about these things. In fact, we even celebrate them as forms of wisdom. But how, then, is this any different from the world that Kant and Isaac Newton hailed from where the authority of the state and the Churches dictated our thoughts and preferences?

The only difference between today and then is that certain kinds of thoughts aren’t a crime. You can’t get in trouble for having them. But culture conditions us all of the time, often on a deeply subconscious level, often without us even realizing that that’s the case. It does so most obviously when we ask for advice, for example, and it does so a little more subtly when we take the results of a scientific study listing averages and try to apply that generalized answer to our non-average life.

Internet culture is a screaming example of this. Everywhere, people are looking for solutions. They want to know this...They want to know that. And the core truth, of course, is that it’s a great place to look for anything. In no small part due to the extended influence of the Enlightenment, the Internet contains our collective knowledge, and much of this knowledge is valuable if you learn to filter sense from nonsense. But the problem, it seems, is that most people come looking for prescriptions. They want advice. They want to fill holes. They want to know 10 things they should do to become successful. They want to read because, apparently, that’s what other smart people do. In short, they want to know everything without actually thinking about it.

To be clear, the fact that the Internet has made knowledge widely accessible or that much of it is prescriptive isn’t the issue. In fact, learning from that knowledge is one of the greatest competitive advantages anyone can give themselves today. The problem is that most people use that knowledge as a shortcut, a prescription, themselves. They ignore their own individuality, its deeply personal experience, and the intuitive judgment their body has developed over time in favor of something that was learned by someone else’s thinking. 


Zat Rana is a top writer in culture, psychology, life lessons, life and self improvement. He suggests that as a rule, if you apply some sort of knowledge into your own life without understanding the deeper thinking patterns that led to the creation of that knowledge, you are not living your own life. And it might work here and there, but sooner or later, you are going to run into a wall, and nobody is going to be able to save you but your own ability to solve that problem with your own personal thinking patterns.

"I have never had a mentor. I can’t even say that I have ever even had a formal teacher who taught me anything useful. Perhaps I was too arrogant (maybe lazy, or a dreamer) in my formative years to listen to the older, wiser folk in my life, folk of experience and knowledge, mistakenly thinking that I had nothing to learn from their advice. But more recently, I’ve begun to realize that while my surface-level arrogance was indeed wrong, the deeper judgment that led to that core distrust of anyone with advice to offer was not."

Almost every living person has some sort of wisdom in them that I lack. I generally believe that. But every single person also occupies a distinct universe shaped by their own mental models of reality, a universe that has different events and people and ideas in it, a universe held together by a different version of language and its interacting patterns. And I might be able to learn something from them by simply observing their actions or even from something they say, but only if that act or that thought inspires some unique thinking patterns in myself. Otherwise, I don’t learn. I only imitate.

Naturally, many of our personal universes interact and intersect, which obviously means that there is shared wisdom that can work for me pretty much in exactly the same way as it did for someone else. Most cliches are generally cliches because they are broadly agreed upon, and many of them fall under this category. But even then, all of us are on distinct time lines. While a general nugget of advice or knowledge might at some point become relevant to my life like it was to someone else’s, the tempo and rhythm of my life are different to that of anyone else’s. Even in such cases, it’s only my own thinking patterns and their discoveries that are going to close that gap.


Sapere aude
 was Kant’s chant for the Enlightenment. Dare to know. As does Zat Rana, I prefer a slightly edited version: Dare to think. Collectively, we already know a lot, and we have a good system in place to help us know more. Individually, as separate beings, however, many of us still have a long way to go, and just “knowing” things through silent consumption and blind conditioning isn’t enough. We also have to think about them—to understand them in our own language patterns, understand them as if we ourselves discovered them.

And ultimately do the best with what we have discovered and what God has given us along the way, in spite of warts and wrinkles. A penchant for Enlightenment has gotten me this far in life and I do not take that lightly. I have new appreciation for the individuality of others and what they have to contribute in the form of inspiration when I am open to it. I am an admitted sponge much of the time.

Illusions of youth have long passed me by. I have become a realist! I am still learning that I do not have to apologize for being me. I am what I am...A product of my environment; often a contradiction, ignoring limitations, living my own life and boldly seeking purpose and fulfillment to the bitter end. 

God help me!

18 January, 2020

AGENDAS IN LIFE?...WE NEED ONLY ONE

What follows are notes from the last church sermon that I prepared but never got to deliver.

The word AGENDA is a noun, formally a plural of agendum, but usually used as a singular with plural a·gen·das or a·gen·da. The dictionary meaning of agenda is: "a list, plan, outline, or the like, of things to be done, matters to be acted or voted upon, etc."

I think that we can all agree that we are living in an agenda-driven society, most evident in politics and business today where we have plans and causes all over the place. That's a given.

But when you stop to think about it, this phenomena does not begin or end there.

Personal agendas, ah yes, we all have a few. They very much influence our lives too, consciously or unconsciously.

With the exception of printed agendas for the conduct of meetings, generally agendas are not always so visible and upfront. 

We all have hidden agendas in our relationships with people especially. Sometimes the agenda is as simple as our need to be liked. At other times it has to do with a business deal or an important favor we want. It would be naive to think that we could or should never take an agenda into a relationship, but we ought at least to be aware of it when we’re doing it.

In most of Jesus’ relationships with people, he didn’t have a hidden agenda. His only agenda was love, and that was worn on his sleeve. He said, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:28-30). On another occasion he said, “Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends. You are My friends” (John 15:13-14).

Most people are looking for favors, but Jesus was looking for a cross. 

-- Most people are trying to get something, but Jesus was trying to give something. 
-- Most people are harsh with others so they themselves will look better, but Jesus was harsh so that others might have it better. 
-- Most people are looking for acceptance, but Jesus was looking to accept.

Author Leighton Ford wrote once about a man who rented billboards all over Northern Ireland and put this message on them: I love you. Is that OK? Signed "Jesus".

That’s it.

Did you ever think that a Christian is a person who should have no agenda except Christ? I know. That’s hard, maybe even nearly impossible, but I believe that is what we are called to aspire to. 


I don’t mean by this that we should have no plans or that we should always be “religious” or “spiritual.” I mean that a Christian, recognizing that Christ is the King, doesn’t have to manipulate or coerce or shout or beat people over the head about anything. We are His property, paid for at a very high price. 

We do, of course, have agendas. It would be impossible to live without one.

Did you hear about the man who lived in India and was required to take a rather long train trip to another city? He had his most valuable belongings packed in a suitcase which he placed in the rack above his seat. He told himself that it was important he stay awake to keep track of that suitcase. But during the night, for only a couple of minutes, he closed his eyes and dozed off. 


When he opened his eyes and looked up, someone had stolen his suitcase. To his amazement, he was relieved. “Thank God,” he exclaimed out loud, “now I can go to sleep!”

It is like we have placed our important stuff in a suitcase. It is called the pearl of great price. “The kingdom of heaven is like a merchant seeking beautiful pearls, who, when he had found one pearl of great price, went and sold all that he had and bought it” (Matthew 13:45-46). 


You know, the best part of all this is that a Christian agenda is always love. Within the context of His agenda, we will find forgiveness (when we fail and promote our own agenda), meaning (when we are looking for a reason to keep going), acceptance (when things don’t turn out the way we expect), and a promise that in the end we will arrive safely Home.

There, now, don’t you feel better?

Just for a moment consider : 1 Corinthians 2:1-5 where the Apostle Paul preached to his people with simplicity and power...


"And I, brethren, when I came to you, did not come with excellence of speech or of wisdom declaring to you the testimony of God. For I determined not to know anything among you except Jesus Christ and Him crucified. I was with you in weakness, in fear, and in much trembling. And my speech and my preaching were not with persuasive words of human wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power, that your faith should not be in the wisdom of men but in the power of God."

With all of the foregoing in mind, reflect on your relationships—with family, friends, co-workers and those at church. Are you carrying any hidden agendas into those relationships? Why? 

This will not be the most profound message that you've ever heard delivered from a pulpit, but that too is reality.